Look My Way
by Silence.is.the.Loudest.Scream2
Summary: I can't, I can't let her in, I can't let her see, I must not look into her eyes more than five seconds. Liley.
1. Intro

**Hey guys'. Well I guess its time for a new chapter story. What do you say? Okay, well this idea won't leave me alone, so I just had to get it out. I don't know where it is going but I'm just going to follow and trust it.**

**This will be in Miley's POV and AU. The majority of the stories on here have Lilly as the misunderstood bad girl, and very few have Miley, so I'm making Miley the misunderstood bad girl. **

**Anyway I hope all of you enjoy. This first chapter is in Normal POV. Just a little intro to the story and short.**

**--x--**

Everything in the world has something the same and some thing that is its opposite.

North and South, East and West,

Left and right up and down,

Darkness and light,

Some are even stronger and mess with your feelings. For every positive there is its negative.

With each person you love, there is one you hate,

Where there is someone happy, another is sad,

Where there is good, there is bound to be evil,

For every tear there is a smile,

Where someone is hungry, they other are full,

The conscious versus the sub or unconscious,

Dreams versus reality,

You cannot have one without the other. There must be both. In a way they complete each other.

Opposites Attract.

So is it possible for someone completely opposite of you to fill the void that you have had in your heart for so long, or will you push them away?

Where is the light in the darkness?

The happiness in the hate?

Where is the line drawn between dreams and reality, east and west, north and south?

Is your subconscious controlling your conscious mind into who you want to be?

Where is the smile behind the tear?

For every beginning there is an end.

How long does that take? To find the one you love and hold on and never let them go.

**--x--**

**Okay so what do you guys' think? Sound good? Are you interested? Let me know and if you are see you in the next chapter, or the real beginning of the story. Till then. :).**


	2. Chapter 1

**Hello everybody. Thank you all so much for reading and reviewing. Glad to see some of you are interested. Hope I don't disappoint. Well here is the first chapter. **

**Remember it's in Miley's POV; there is no Hannah Montana, also the first two chapters will not have a lot of dialect, I'm going to try and kind of introduce you to Miley's thinking, and very AU. **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**--x--**

I hate the sound of my alarm going off, it irks me. It's a sign that the night ended and a new day has just begun, and I'm not ready. I don't like the day; I'm more of a night person. It's weird. The way light can manipulate the way you see things, then at night, with no light, they have a different shape or form, kind of eerie, because color comes from light, and your eyes have not yet adjusted to the night yet. That's when I love it. The second you turn off the light, you are in surrounded by complete darkness, but only for that split second, because your eyes adjust quickly.

I limply let my arm sneak out from under the covers and shut my alarm off. I sit up and stretch in my bed, letting out a yawn. I hate getting up, well getting up is not bad, it's knowing where I'm going to be in an hour or less. School. I don't care for it. Being surrounded by dirty brick walls for at least seven hours, or nine, depending on if you get detention or not. It's just a place that cuts you off. Teachers telling you to do this and do that. I feel like a puppet. Like I don't have a state of mind, they control me. You write a paper on your opinion and it's the teacher says it's too biased, seriously?

That's why I rather not go, I rather drop out. Live my life, let my mind explore, see the world, no one to hold me back or tell me what to do. How much math, science, history, and English do you need? I say take the few years, y'know the basics, and if your job requires something in that field take it. You should not have to be required to do it.

I throw the covers off of me and make my way to the bathroom. I grab a brush as I walk by my dresser before I enter. I look in the mirror and see a blank stare coming my way. No smile; today is not a good day. I take my brush and comb through my brown locks, with several streaks of dark blue, mostly around my bangs. My hair is one of my priorities, it's my best quality. I like my hair straight, and my bangs in my face, covering one of my eyes. Just to bring mystery and interest in anyone.

When I'm content with my hair, I move on to the everyday stuff everyone normally does. Go to the bathroom, brush my teeth, and get changed. I slip into one of my black pair of jeans, not the skinny kind, just enough stretch in the right amount of places. I hate that new trend, skinny jeans; I hate trends and stereotypes all together. Just because you wear all black does not mean you are Goth, just because you have jet black hair and always wear band t-shirts does not mean you are emo, just because you pop your collar does not make you preppy. You are you and you should wear what you like. I pull on a plain white long sleeve shirt add a short sleeve black hoodie. And I'm happy with myself.

I throw on my white Nike shoes grab my backpack and make my way downstairs. No one is home. I look around, usually my Dad is in the kitchen making breakfast, sometimes for both us, sometimes just for him, sometimes just for me. Today he is not. I roll my eyes; he has been out all weekend, on a date. Oh joy; I can only imagine what he has been doing.

I put my backpack down and make my way to the fridge grab some milk, go to the cabinet grab a bowl, and then grab some cereal. I tilt my head back and let out a sigh, since Dad has not been home all weekend there are no groceries. Only thing left is the Raisin Brand. I take it and pour it into the bowl, pouring milk in. Raisin Brand is not my number one pick for cereal, but I rather not starve, so I eat it without complaining, until the end, where all the corn flakes are floating around in the milk and you can't drink it cause the get all mushy and can make you gag.

I dump the bowl in the sink. Grab my bag, pull out my iPod, and head out the door. I shove my head phones in my ears, Three Days Grace blast into my ears. I love music. It's a great thing. What ever mood you are in music can match it perfectly. When you are depressed you could listen to something soft and light. When you are upset you could listen to rock or metal, get all that energy out. I don't have a special or favorite type of music. I like all; they all have power and meaning. Hip-hop, rap, alternative, pop-punk, rock, metal. If it's good I'll listen to it.

A car whizzes by me carrying a bunch of teenagers laughing and giggling as they make their way to school. How can they be so happy at seven in the morning?! I give them an evil look as they drive by. I'm not jealous of them or anything; I just wish I could have a car. You think being a junior you would automatically have one, but me I don't. I can understand that though. Our budget is small and we can only buy the necessities. Sometimes I just wish, y'know, for like a day.

I pull my headphones out of my ears, iPods are not allowed in school, that's bullshit, if you ask me. Like if you have study hall or something we should be able to listen to them. But schools make up all kind of ridiculous laws that I can't stand. I open the flap of my backpack and stuff my iPod in its usual spot. I let it fall back down as I approach my locker. Turning my combination, without even thinking. It's amazing, it's like the school has you programmed. You know what classes you have to be in and when, you know what days you have certain classes, and when the bell rings you just know what lunch you are suppose to take. Not a bad system, to me it sounds like a cult, but hey it keeps us all in line.

I open my bag again and take books that where in there into my locker. Then taking the books I need out. "Shit." As I take my math book out I realize that I had math homework and did not do it. Perfect, this class is a requirement for graduation, and I'm near failing, if I don't pass this year, I'll have to take it again next year, or during summer vacation, and I do not want that. "Ugh" What am I going to do?

"Yo Miles." I close my locker and lean up against it after I turn around at the sound of my name, and slightly smile. Oliver is coming up from the hallway. Oliver is kind of like me, an inch taller, dark brown hair, the skater style, and layered clothing, we have been friends since third grade, and it has been great. He reaches me and we do our signature handshake, I guess in away you could say I'm slightly a tomboy, but that does not bother me. Society has too many expectations for the girly-girly type. "What's up? How was your weekend?"

I let out a sigh and push myself away from the lockers, traveling to the cafeteria, where we usually spend the first fifteen minuets before school starts. "Not much and usual."

I shrug my shoulders and answer flatly, I was alone all weekend and my Dad still was not back yet. It was not the first time he did that when he was dating someone new. Sometimes it could be a whole week; I just wish he would act like a real Father once and a while. "That good huh?"

"Yyyeahhh sure whatever, listen could I see your math homework." I don't like to talk about my personal life. Not to anyone, if I ever feel like crashing down I will talk to Oliver, but that does not happen a lot. I am strong; I could take care of myself. I don't need everyone worrying about me or taking care of me. If I ever need to talk to Oliver I know he is there. And he respects that I like to keep things to myself.

"Yes, but you wont learn it if you keep copying off of me." I let out a sigh, there are times Oliver is just like me, a free spirit, and then there are those times were he goes all perfect Momma's boy on me.

"C'mon Oliver, I need a good grade to pass and at this rate its not happening, but homework counts for a lot so just fork it over." Take out a piece of paper and pen and begin to write down the title of the assignment.

"Fine." Oliver digs in his backpack and pulls out his notebook, unhooking it to take out his homework and giving it to me.

--x--

I finish all the problems just in the knick of time as last bell rings to get to class. Kids scramble to their feet and are out the door, all in a hurry, especially the freshmen. I got to laugh at them. In the beginning they all scurry around and don't know which way is up and which way is down. Being upper class men you have to "help them out" and boy do we do it. Some are mean and others are harmless, but if you just stand in the middle of the hallway why some of us are trying to get from point A to point B you are asking for it. I'm mean how hard is it to move to the side, against the wall?

Oliver and I make our way to our math class. I walk between the aisles of desks, to the last seat in the third row. Its fine with me, I hate the front. In the back, you have some freedom, to doze off, daydream, stare at nothing in particular, or doodle. I go for a combo of staring at nothing and doodling. This way the teacher thinks you are paying attention and taking notes.

Oliver sits diagonal from me a desk ahead, perfectly for me to cheat off of, yet he does not know it. I think that is the only reason I'm still hanging by a thread in grades here. Oliver's a total math geek, if I don't copy off of him, I'm sure to flunk out. English and History are a little more my subjects. English ties in with ballads and poems, which ties into music, and history is a mixture between war and politics, either way someone is fighting, and that intrigues me. All though I hate everything in general. A lot of teachers like to know what you do best in and what is your favorite subject, blah, blah, blah.

I pull out "my" homework and place it on the side of my desk, then taking my notebook and letting it plop on my desk, making a loud thud. Everyone turns their attention to me and just stares. What was the big deal? I just put my notebook down, why stare? I give them all the middle finger, with a silly face: my tongue sticking out and eyes crossed eyed, thank God the teacher was not in yet, or I would have gotten in trouble. They all turn their attention back to whatever the heck it was before. I spot Oliver looking back at me and smirking, I stick my tongue out at him as I fold my arms over my chest and he turns around.

The teacher walks in as soon as the bell rings and begins the class. Putting a problem up on the board as he comes around and checks to see if we did our homework. I lean forward in my seat and pretend to work on the problem. Only four more hours until lunch, God help me.

--x--

The day droned on with no events happening at all, but what do you expect it's Monday, nothing ever exciting happens on a Monday. I walk out of school with my backpack and iPod in hand, ready to put the headphones in my ears as soon as I'm out of here. Oliver offers to hang out behind the mall for a smoke, but I decline, I have to buy groceries. I'm not really a smoker, but I kind of like the smell of a freshly light cigarette. On occasion I'll take one, but I prefer second-hand. Drinking I'm not big on either, I'll have my one or two at parties and that is my limit. Your body is something important and you should take care of every organ.

--x--

I walk home with nothing but bags wrapped around my arms and the squeak of the grocery cart wheels traveling across the pavement. I had to steal the cart, I could not carry every single bag to my house, but I promise to return it later, I just have to keep it out of sight of my Dad, if he saw it he will flip, if he is home that is.

I start to sweat and take off my short sleeve hoodie and roll up my sleeves, tired and out of breath. On my way home I notice a vacant house, now booming with people. Well I should not say that exactly but there was a car and moving van, and that's the most action that house has seen in years. Shocking to me someone finally moved in. I don't pay attention much because I'm only a few yards away from my house.

I place all the bags on the front porch and go around back to hide the grocery cart. I pick up some bags and struggle opening the door. "Oh good," I hear the sound of my Dad's voice and turn on my side to see him rummaging through the cabinets. "You went shopping, let me help."

"Thanks." Tired and out of breath my Dad takes the groceries out of my arms and places them on the counter, searching through them. He pulls out a grinder, which was made for me at the deli, and starts heading upstairs. "What about the rest?"

My Dad stops and looks at me then outside to the front porch. "Mile, I would but I have someone-something to do upstairs."

I fold my arms and raise and eyebrow at my Dad. "Is this the girl that you went out with Friday night and just came home with?" I swear my Dad has a new flavor at least every month, if not week. I dislike every girl he sees no matter how nice she is, she is not my Mom.

"Now Mile, watch your tone, I'm the parent you are the child." I roll my eyes; to me I take more responsibility to the parent role than he does. _I_ look out for him and me. "I have business stuff to take care of and I'm sure you have school stuff, so get to it."

I tighten my jaw and he heads up the stairs without another look back. "Whatever." I make my way to the front porch and grab the rest of the groceries, putting them away. Then looking through everything to find something to eat, after my Dad just took my dinner.

**--x--**

**Okay, so that was chapter one, a little look inside of Miley. So who do you think is moving in? Could this person possibly cross roads with Miley? We will find out next chapter. Till then. :).**


	3. Chapter 2

**Hey guys', glad some of you like the first chapter, thank you for reading and reviewing. Umm...I have nothing else to say so hope you enjoy this chapter. **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**--x--**

Once again the alarms sounds and I'm doing my usual routine. Why do we have to have school five out of seven days a week? Where does it end? Elementary, middle or junior high, high school, then college, work, career, retirement. Usually by that age you are too old to do anything that you wanted to do when you were young. It seems as if the only time you have freedom is when you are a baby to when you are a senior. Isn't this a shit life?

I make my way down the hall and get a quick glance in my Dad's room. Two lumps in bed. My Dad probably slept with so many people and will probably if not already have an STD. I roll my eyes and sigh, trudging downstairs for breakfast.

I get milk, bowl, and cereal, finally something good: Lucky Charms. I love those little marshmallows. I eat everything else first and save as many marshmallows as I can for last and at the end my milk has a blue and pinkish tint to it, allowing me to slurp it all up. I throw the bowl in the sink and head out the door with my head phones in my ears.

The morning is cool and crisp, I like it. It keeps you alert, the cool air brushes across your face, turning your cheeks and nose red, as the cold air fills your lungs. Fall sure is coming. "Hey Miles wait up!" I turn around at the sound of my name and see Oliver running towards me.

I let a small laugh escape my lips. His hair was a mess, half of his long sleeve shirt was tucked in, shoelace was untied, and his backpack was dangling from his arm. He finally catches up to me out of breath. "Over sleep?" Oliver nods his head and nothing else between us is said, as we walk to school in silence. Oliver rarely walks with me, his mom usually drives him, they both have offered to take me along for the ride, but I decide against it. If you ever get Oliver's mother angry, it'll be the last thing you do. She gets this man voice and a certain vein starts to pop out in front of her forehead, it's kind of scary if you ask me.

"Who's moving in?" I turn my head to the once vacant house now with three cars in the driveway and lights on in the house; one downstairs, I'm assuming the kitchen and another upstairs, my guess a bedroom. The moving van no longer there.

I shrug my shoulders. "Dunno." I reach into my pocket and change the song on my iPod.

"Maybe they have a kid." I look back at the house. Probably, who else has three cars, it's not common here; one for one parent, the other for the other parent. So a third car would be a good guess that a teenager or young adult is living there, maybe in our grade.

"Yeah well if it is a kid I'm sure we will probably see them in school soon and if not good guess is that person is in college, at work, or totally lazy." Oliver says nothing as we approach the school and head our different ways towards our lockers; we will meet up later in the cafeteria.

--x--

I put my books away and take them out, same old routine, same old boring routine, I swear it's like the twilight zone or something. Sadly it's too early in the year for any skipping of school to take place yet. I slam my locker and once again people stare. "What!?" I throw my arms out to the sides and raise my eyebrows. I have a slight reputation, but you think people would be used to that by now.

"Miss Stewart." Oh great, teacher alert. I grunt and turn to him. The typical teacher look: bald guy, slight gray hair around the rim of his head, glasses, and a sweater vest with a tie. I'll get scornfully told to show some respect to my other peers and teachers. I pretty much tune him out and lightly nod my head. He keeps talking but I'm not listening.

I'm distracted. My eyes maneuvering around him as he talks down to me, waving a finger. There is a new student here, must be that new family moved in, they have a kid after all. I smile slightly. She's not bad looking, beautiful actually, sort of long blonde hair, perfect body shape, not to bad if you ask me. She is walking timidly, hands clutching the straps of her backpack, tightly, and looking around everywhere probably for the Principals office.

She looks up and over to me and I forget how to breathe. I finally see her eyes, but I don't think she can see mine; my bangs cover one eye completely. Her eyes are a soft bright blue, sparkling, like stars. My mouth becomes dry as she approaches where I stand, with a teacher yelling at me, way to make a first impression Stewart, and smiles, slightly, a light tug at the corners of her mouth, but it is there. My smile grows and she looks down quickly, obviously shy, hair falling in her face, and walks on by with my eyes following her, nice ass. "Miss Stewart are you listening?"

"To what?" I answer rudely, I was having a moment here, and turn around to come back to the realization that a teacher was talking to me. I swallow hard and give him a small innocent smile. His arms are folded across his chest and eyes like daggers. No words need to be said, he points and I go; on my way to the principal's office.

I drop my backpack to the floor and let it drag as I walk in the office. The new girl sitting quietly in the chair, backpack in her lap, holding it tightly; she's too cute. "Morning Miley."

One of the lady's at the office greets me, this somewhat has become routine for me. After so many trips to the office to talk to the principal me and her developed a relationship. "Hey Carol."

"Go ahead in." I sigh and mutter a thank you, starting to make my way to the principal's office. "Okay, Miss Truscott." I turn slightly and look out the corner of my eye. The blonde girl stands up and heads over to the front desk. Well at least I know her last name and if she way paying any attention she knows my first.

--x--

I was pretty much in the principal's office all morning, by the time I got out the last bell rang and it was time to head to class. I did not pay much attention to what he said, all I know is I don't have a detention but just a warning, I could live with that. As I left I was kind of hoping that Truscott girl was still there, but sadly she wasn't. Maybe will we run into each other again?

I walk into my history class and slip Oliver a note, talking about what happened this morning and why I was not at the cafeteria and about the new girl. Oliver looks back at me and smirks slightly. Two years ago I confessed to Oliver and only Oliver that I was bisexual. He thought it was cool, he said that, that means you like the person and not what they look like or whatever. I only had one girl ever catch my attention; it did not go so well.

We were at a party I had my one or two drinks she was buzzed as anything. I guess you can say I took slight advantage of her, but she did not seem to mind. She was horny as anything and I just wanted to experiment; so we did. I'm not happy or proud about it, but it was an experience. Something new and different, nothing wrong with trying something new.

--x--

I stuff everything into my locker and turn around to lean against it. I lean my head back as I wait for Oliver, we usually walk to lunch together and that way we could get lunch and get a table without separating. It could take awhile. Oliver has a lot of friends, I on the other hand don't. I'm more of a loner, its okay with me. I've been a loner for awhile, up until third grade when I met Oliver. He was the only one to give me a chance and I'm glad he did. One friend is plenty. One person you can trust, tell your secrets to, and know that they will always be there. Any bigger and then you get the gossip, the lies, and fights. I'm fine with it just being Oliver and Miley.

"Hey new kid!?" I'm pulled from my thoughts and I turn my head all the commotion. My eyes narrow. Its Amber and Ashley aka the queens of the school, they make the rules and set the standards. They approach Truscott as she was putting things away in her locker. "How about sitting with us at lunch today? I think you might just qualify as a third member." Amber walks around her and eyes her up and down.

No. Don't do it. Don't do it Truscott. Don't become apart of them. I lean off against the wall. My heart is pounding and my throat is dry, unable to find a voice and stop Truscott from doing something stupid. She smiles, and I frown. They will kill her, destroy her, before I get to know the real her. No, it's not fair. My arms are down at my sides and my hands tighten into fist, she goes with them, she got sucked into the oh so glamorous world of popularity, my fists release, blood flowing back in them. And I watch her go.

--x--

I got my lunch, not really to keen on eating it, and I'm sitting with Oliver. He looks around. "So where is this new kid?"

I roll my eyes and turn around to scan the crowd, growing a look of disgust as I spot the popular kid table. Truscott changed, her clothes and hair are different, they are all pink and shiny, if you want my opinion she looks hotter, she is smiling and happy, laughing along with the crowd. I hate clicks; I hate how others define who you are. I have been with this group of people for years and Amber and Ashley hate my guts, Truscott is here for a few hours and she is already in, how unfair. I turn back around and spread venom on my words. "With Amber and Ashley." Any shot I had with her are now gone.

Oliver doesn't need me to point, the popular kid's sit in the same place every time. "Daaayumm. She is smokin'." I shot Oliver a death glare, I had dibs first, she may be out of my league now, but I had dibs. Oliver clears his throat and looks away from the table. "Sorry." He mumbles and picks at his food. "So have you talked to her?"

I look back at the table, a sad expression on my face. "Not really. We saw each other in the hallway before school, in the principal's office, and in the hallway before lunch. She only looked at me once, I think or at least I hope it was me, and then turned away."

"Well at least she knows you kind of exist." I laugh slightly but don't say anything. Oliver always will do what he can to make me feel better. He wants me to be happy; I just don't know how to grasp that full emotion. I'm kind of happy, but I don't feel fully happy. I guess I used to be at one point, but I don't remember now, I wish I was in total bliss, but I'm not. But I don't think anyone is truly one hundred percent happy, so that means I'm normal. Unless its not happiness I want, maybe a different emotion. "Hey I know what can help, you me behind the mall, and some cancer sticks."

I hear the shuffle of chairs and look back. All the kids at the popular table get up and start to walk our way. I guess it's time for them to gawk at themselves in the mirror, they better hurry its been longer than fifteen minuets for all of them. My eyes fix on Truscott and she passes by the table where Oliver and I are sitting, not even bothering to look. I guess Amber and Ashley have filled her in, geeks, nerds, and nobodies are pointless, so they don't bother looking. I turn back to Oliver and smile. "Sounds good." A smile spreads on his face as well.

**--x--**

**Ummm…will "Truscott" stick with Amber and Ashley? Will Miley get a chance to talk with her? Find out next chapter. Till then. :). **


	4. Chapter 3

**Hey guys', sorry the updates are like a week apart, but with school (and me trying to find a job), I have a feeling that its going to be that way for awhile. Anyway thank you all for reading and reviewing, it means a lot to me, so Thank You. Please enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**--x--**

I lean my head back against the brick wall and close my eyes, taking in the smoke, it fly's into my nostrils filling my lungs, making me taste it, and I want to cough, but the all to familiar scent smells good to me. I raise one foot against the wall and try to sit myself up. I look over at Oliver who is taking a long puff, the ends of his cigarette glows orange, a small ember burning inside a flame, and small white ashes fall to the floor, turning black as it descends. I smile.

Sometimes I feel there is a light inside me burning, a small candle, ready to be more, get out and flame into an uncontrollable fire. But I hold it back. I don't know why. Maybe I'm scared, I mean what could happen if I let the fire spread? Will all my emotions run haywire? Will they take control, leaving me to do crazy things, and unforgiving tasks? I guess I'll never find out, for I never let the fire out.

"Why do you smoke those things anyway?" Oliver looks up at me and takes the cigarette from his mouth puffing out smoke through his mouth and nose. He looks at me with questioning eyes. "I mean you smoke pot, you get high, you drink alcohol, you get drunk, you smoke cigarettes you get cancer. Wouldn't it be funner to do the others?"

Oliver lets out a small laugh, as he wipes the ends of the cigarette on his jeans, before placing it in his mouth for another puff. "I don't know Miles. I guess it's calming, it warms your body up, y'know?"

I shrug my shoulders, lean off against the wall, and place my hands in my pockets. "So it's hot chocolate in a stick?"

"Sure, whatever Miles." Oliver throws the cigarette bud down and steps on it, crunching it into the pavement. "You headin' back home?"

I suck in air through my teeth, sending chills through my nerves. "Yeah, I guess, see ya around?"

"Sure." Oliver and I do our handshake and we take off in different directions. My mind is clouded and it's not because of the smoke, it's because of that girl: Truscott. I only saw her once and she took my breath away and for the rest of the day I could not help but think about her.

I want to know all about her. Her favorite color, food, music, her hobbies, sports, instruments, books. Any thing and everything. I want to know her history and right now. Where is she from? Why did she move her? Any siblings or pets? What are her parents like? What is she like?

At first glance I would never have thought of her to be a clone of Amber and Ashley. It may have been a splint second, but in her eyes I saw something…something, and it was not Amber and Ashley. There is something powerful about her, this certain aura she carries. Something that sets her different from the rest, something that interests me.

That doesn't happen often. There are a lot of people here I dislike; they annoy me to no end. They are your typical popular people. Always talk in class so you can't do you work, or the teacher does not get through a lesson and you are not ready for the test. The ones who seem they can do whatever the heck they want, but if you do it, you are pretty much in doom for the rest of the year. The ones you glare at and wish they can see things from your point of view. Because they don't know. They get cars, money, new fashion trends, boyfriends, girlfriends, parties, and hardly have to work for it. They look at you and see no one, a pathetic loser, they don't know, they don't know our home life, our past. I hate them.

And she…she is not them, I could tell. She maybe with them right now, but she is not them. Sigh, just one day and this girl has captivated me.

--x--

I scrape my feet across the sidewalk and out of wonder look toward the Truscott's house. I see her. She is on her front porch rummaging through her purse, probably looking for her keys, there is only one car in the driveway, so her parents must not be home. I slow down my pace so I could watch her. Even from the distance I could hear the jingle of the keys, as she takes them from her purse, but they accidentally fall. My mouth goes dry and I swallow what I can, she lets out a frustrated groan as she bends down to pick them up. I watch her every movement, the back of her shirt rides up, showing skin, her legs tighten, even under the jeans I could tell she is pretty toned, she must do some sport, then she rises, and my eyes follow her back up traveling through her long blonde hair to the back of her head.

She finally gets the key in and opens the door. She swings it fully and drops her purse to the side as she turns around, facing outside. She looks up, my heartbeat quickens, and she catches my gaze, I turn away quickly, feeling heat rush to my cheeks. I tighten my jaw and do the best to watch out of the corner of my eye. The door is closed and she is gone.

I let out a breath of air and brush my hair with my hands. Why? Why did I have to fall for the new kid? The new kid who knows I exist but does not care?

--x--

I open my door and find my Dad sitting on the couch watching television. "Hey Mile. Did you have a nice day?"

I raise my eyebrow and cautiously make my way behind him, around the couch. Now he takes the role as Daddy, wee. "Umm…yeah sure."

"That's good." He does not take his eyes off the show and I figure we are done so I make my way upstairs. "What would you like for dinner darlin'?"

I have one hand on the railing and my mind is so lost, I can't think to move upstairs. "Uh…" He rarely asks me what I want for dinner. I usually just come down, if he has something for me to eat, I eat, and if not I make something myself. I place one foot on the first step. "It doesn't matter to me."

"Okay great. Hey how about some dessert tonight?" What? Is there like a switch on him somewhere where he turns on and off his parenting skills.

"Why?" I change my mind about going upstairs and walk over to one of the chairs by the couch and sit down.

"Don't know, maybe we could start a tradition? What do you think? We need more of those don't we?" My Dad finally turns away from the television and looks at me with shining eyes and a happy smile.

I'm still the in the same state of shock so I could only imagine what my face looks like. Tradition? Why start now? We have been living in the condition we have been in for the past ten years, why change now? Not that I wouldn't mind, I would give anything to have the Dad I had when I was a kid, but so much stuff has changed, I barely know him anymore, what's the point of trying to get something back, if it is already gone? Seeing as how awkward I am right now I dare ask the question I want to but I do it anyway. "Is this about your new 'girlfriend'?"

I hold up my hands and put quotations around the word "girlfriend". The only last time I could remember my Dad acted like this was when I was ten. He had been dating a girl for almost a year, and that is a big accomplishment for him, and he decided to be all nice so I would like her more. I never will though, not one of those whore, hoes, sluts, or whatever you want to call them will never be my Mom. "'Course not." My Dad shifts in his seat, causing his long but short hair to bounce around.

"Okay Dad." I get up. I don't want to talk anymore. My Dad is a big boy he could do whatever he wants but he cannot control me. I don't care whose roof I live under, I am two years of becoming and adult, and I'm ready to get out. I go to my room, shut the door, and let the power of music take me away.

--x--

Morning. The sun peaks past my closed blinds on my windows and let streaks of sunlight fill the room. I stretch and head back into the twilight zone morning ritual.

Dinner with my Dad last night was passed awkward. The only real sound was of us chewing. We tried to stir up a conversation, but my answers were short and simple. After awhile I think he just gave up. Too bad he couldn't see he gave up nine years ago.

I'm in school and at my locker without even realizing it. Did you ever do that? Like you did something but then later don't remember that you did it, and you question yourself about it? That's what this morning felt like. Before I even new it I was at the cafeteria table, just waiting for Oliver.

There was a certain buzz going around at the popular table. I couldn't hear much, the echo of all the voices in the cafeteria could get pretty loud. I turn around, Truscott is with them. I don't know if there is a frown on my face, but I'm pretty sure sadness has reached my eyes. She is wearing a diamond studded jean jacket, with a sparkly pink shirt, hair styled, like a professional, I can't see below her waist, and she is smiling. She whips her bangs out of her eyes and continues to talk to her "friends".

The only words I could make out are: Party, Amber's, Friday. I turn back around and see Oliver come my way. He slips his backpack off and sits down. "Hey did you hear?" Since Oliver has more friends, he is kind of in a higher status than I am, he knows a lot of which is going on. "There is a party Friday night at Amber's, you in?"

I look into his brown eyes. They are excited and filled with wonderment. It doesn't matter what I say because I know Oliver will go with or without me. I turn to look back at Truscott and see her laughing it up with Amber and Ashley. I look back at Oliver in smile. "I'm game."

"Yes." Oliver pumps his fists in the air and sparkles shine in his eyes. At least when I go I'll know one person and Oliver probably wont leave my side unless I let him free of his leash. It doesn't matter to me. I look back over at Truscott and my mind is wheeling with ideas. "This is going to be a great Friday."

If she is friends with Amber and Ashley there is a good chance she will be there too. That gives me a chance to talk to her. Knowing Amber this will be a big blowout, many people, dancing, and beer, no one will know or remember that I came, or tried to pick up a girl. I smile and speak quietly, mostly to myself. "Yeah, it should be great."

**--x--**

**Mmmmkay. So what do you guys' think? Will Miley finally get "Truscott's" first name? Will it be at the party? Is the party going to be a good thing? Find out next chapter. Till then. :) **


	5. Chapter 4

**Hey guys', thank you for reading and reviewing, hope you are enjoying the story. :). Enjoy. **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**--x--**

It seemed like forever for Wednesday to transform into Friday and Friday afternoon to change into Friday night. I won't admit it but I'm nervous. I have been nervous since Wednesday, since I knew about the party.

All I could think about is Truscott. What she will be wearing? Who will she be hanging out with? What perfume will she be wearing? Will she notice me? Will she talk to me? Will I find a way to make her notice and talk to me? What will I say?

The party didn't even start and I'm sweating, feeling nauseous and lightheaded. I throw and pair of jeans out of my closet and it lands on the floor. "This is ridiculous, I hardly know her! Why am I trying to impress her?!" I shuffle through the rack of shirts and go back and forth trying to find the right one. I didn't even say one word to the girl and she already has me strung up.

In away that scares me. I shouldn't feel this way, but I do. For some odd reason I can't shake I want to know her, her to know me, I want to hear her voice, her laugh, see her smile, I want to make a memory…I want her. And that is scary. All these emotions and feelings is it normal? To want someone you barely even know? And have it hurt? To want to touch them? Talk to them? Hold them?

Maybe I'm going insane, maybe this is just a little school crush, maybe it will pass. But if it does not what does that mean? What if we don't meet? What if we do and all we will ever be is friends or acquaintances? I guess I could settle for that, I don't want that, but I'll settle for it. I feel that she is something special, I know she is. Something inside me is burning for her. I feel like it's my intuition, my subconscious, or God telling me to go for it. I just hope I don't make a fool of myself.

I grab a pair of black jeans, a silver spaghetti top, and a fitting leather jacket. Throw on a plain black pair of shoes, and I'm on my way. Its Friday so my Dad should be-"Where ya goin' bud?"- gone.

Damn. Why is he still here? I make my way to the door and hesitate to answer, knowing I'm going to stutter. "Um o-out, is that okay?"

My Dad walks from the counter in the kitchen to about halfway in the living room. "Out where, with whom?"

My hand touches the doorknob and I turn it slightly. This whole parenting thing is getting pretty annoying. "Out there, with Oliver. I'll be back late."

I don't give him anymore than that and I'm out the door. I don't care what he thinks. Right now I'm on a mission and if I want something I go for it, even if I end up failing at the end, I tried.

--x--

Oliver and I make are way up Amber's mansion home steps, the music is booming, the smell of alcohol fills the room, the lights are dim, with strobe lights causing a weird effect, there is slight fog hovering over the ground, people are dancing, or grinding, it looks like sex on the dance floor to me, and drinking. Amazing not even an hour into the party and it's almost ready to get out of hand.

Oliver and I walk into the house more. I turn his way. I guess he spotted a "hottie" because he is fixing his hair, clothes, checking his breath, and wiggling his eyebrows. I have things to do and so I let Oliver go and have fun. "Go ahead," Even though he is right next to me I have to shout above the music. "I'll be fine, go have fun."

He doesn't say anything. Well at least I don't think he says anything, maybe a "thank you" but I don't hear it. I make my way through the crowd of restless and soon to be horny teenagers and go into the kitchen.

No sign of Truscott yet. The kitchen is less packed. You should only be in here no more than five to seven minuets to get a drink or snack. I decide to hang out here for awhile; I snag myself a beer and sit up on a stool next to the island. I drink the beer slowly. Letting it burn through my throat. It's like the perfect way to hurt yourself without anyone seeing. If you start cutting yourself, you can only hide the scars for so long, before someone sees. It's like burning yourself while taking a shower. I have done it, a couple of times. It feels good. The heat is so intense it feels like nails across your skin, turning it red and vulnerable. I have peeled my skin, but the next morning no one can tell.

"What are you doing here Stewart?" I midway drink and bite down on the rim of the cup as I hear the voice of Amber Addison behind me.

I turn around and see her "posse" behind her, including Truscott. I put my half drunken cup down and face her, wanting to keep my cool. "I'm here with Oliver."

I turn my attention to everyone else. I want to talk to Truscott but not with Amber and Ashley beside her. Amber puts her hands on her hips and Ashley folds her across her chest. They are giving me a glare but I don't care. I have to get rid of them, but try and catch interest to Truscott. Why did this have to be so hard? I avert my eyes to some guy who will be hot by any girl's standard. Amber looks to see what I'm looking at and lets out a laugh. "Some girl advice?" Amber walks around me and puts her arm around my shoulders. I can smell the alcohol on her breath. "Aim lower."

I hate her. My eyes narrow and she snickers as she gets ready to leave. I stick my foot out underneath her and she trips. She turns and looks at me as if she wants to kill me, if only she knew how many times I "killed" her. "Low enough?"

I raise my eyebrows with my question and she just scoffs and storms off. Ashley right behind her. Truscott walks slowly behind and turns my way for a split second, and I turn away. Not the second, or is it third, impression I want to make on her. I wanna go home after that, I look into the rest of my drink and chug the rest.

I enter the crowed room. The music is louder and many more people start to grind on each other. The fog or mist helps cool the room but it still smells like sweat. There are too many people crowded in one area. I can't find Oliver anywhere, but I have to get out of this claustrophobic room. Oliver and I always have a deal to never leave a party without the other. I know not to leave. So I zigzag through the group of people and magically find myself out side.

I let out a deep breath, wiping sweat from my brow that I did not even know was there. I'm so pissed at myself. Why can't I be good? I stroll around. No one is out here. The pool is lightly hitting the sides making a nice calming noise and the moonlight is reflecting perfectly off of it. I look down into the water and see my refection. Am I happy? Do I look happy? What is happy? Christmas morning and getting that one gift you wanted? Family togetherness?

Do I turn people off, by my attitude and outward appearance? Am I unapproachable? I grow angry, my eyebrows knit together and my eyes narrow, I kick the water, no longer wanting to see the reflection I have become but wishing the reflection was once the girl I used to know. Why did this stuff happen to me?

I let out a sigh and walk with one wet shoe to a chair and sit down. The swing of the door, brings my attention to the person coming out, light tap of footsteps, and the person is almost visible. "Oh sorry, I didn't know anyone was out here."

It's a girl voice, one I do not recognize, but I feel at peace when I hear it. "No," I sit up and swing my legs over the chair, still sitting. I don't know why but I do not want this person to go. "It's okay." She stops on her heel and turns around, cautiously, it's to dim to see her face but I continue. "Please sit."

"A-are you sure." The girl steps closer and brushes her bangs behind her ear; some not long enough to stay there so they fall out. I can see her: Truscott. I smile, as nice as I can, and nod. "Thanks."

She says breathlessly and walks over to the chair on the right of me. "No problem, I needed the company." I hope that did not sound too desperate. I mean I'm totally fine being alone, I don't want her to take pity on me. I swing my legs back over and have them rest. "So…uh, you the new kid?"

She lets a small smile spread across her face, allowing me to see some of her teeth, and it's a cute small smile. "Yeah, I'm-I'm Lilly, Lilly Truscott." She's nervous, I can't imagine why, she seemed fine after she met Amber and Ashley. She extends her hand and I shake it. Her hands are soft and smooth I don't want to let go. "And your Miley right? Miley…Stewart?" She moves her head slightly to her right and her eyes follow, but they stare at me.

I thought her name was beautiful but the way mine rolled off her lips it sounded beyond beautiful. My mouth is slightly agape and it opens and closes as I try and form words. "I uh…yeah." I let it all out in one breath, trying to form my words but my brain wont function, and my hand starts to sweat, so I pull out of her grip. "Um, h-how did-did you-?"

"Do I know your name?" I look away from her, if her voice and name can make me stumble on my words, I don't want to look in her eye. I bit the inside of my lower lip and nod. She jerks her head to signal inside the party. "Amber and Ashley." Of course, I can only imagine the stories those girls tell people. "They pretty much filled me in on everybody." I nod my head to show that I am listening. She is staring at me, but I refuse to look her way. Her eyes squint and her eyebrows knit together. "Y'know you don't seem as _bad_ as they said you were."

I look up at her, not her eyes, but just at her. Then I look around. "Sorry to disappoint?" I raise my shoulders at my question. What did they tell her?

She lets out a small giggle and pulls her bangs behind her ear again. "No, no, it's-it's okay." She smiles as she says it, then she looks into my eyes and they shine, I avert my eyes away. I can't really look into peoples eyes long. People say that looking into someone's eyes is looking into there soul, you can see there history, there story. I have a soul, I just don't know what kind it is, and I do have history, but I don't want anyone to find out my true story. So I keep one eye hidden behind my bangs and don't stare into the other's long. I don't even do staring contest.

I put my head down, I can feel a small blush rising in my cheeks, I try to remember that one trick I read onetime to stop that from happening, but I can't remember it now. I turn my head back up as soon as the blush is gone and decide to spark up a conversation. "So, where did you move from?"

She gets more comfortable in her seat, putting one leg over the other. "Actually I'm originally from here." I listen carefully, fully interested. "But I had to move due to my Mom's job, we headed out to Oregon," I raise my eyebrow, like the yeah-right-seriously look, and she laughs. I smile, I feel like we already have a connection. "Yeah, but thanks to business and a few talks, we came back. So how about you, what is your story?"

I adjust in my seat, not to get comfortable, but out of nervousness. "My story?" She nods. "No, you don't want to hear my story; I don't even have a story worth telling."

"Oh come on, we all have stories and they all deserve to be told." She stretches out her hand and places it on mine, if I didn't believe we had an instant connection before, I believe it now. I look down at our hands then back up at her, she smiles. "Something? Anything? Whatever you want."

"Um…my favorite color is blue?" I put it as a question, wondering if that is what she wanted.

She lets out a giggle and pulls her hand away. "Well now that's a start." I smile. I like her. From these few minuets I could tell she is not another Amber or Ashley, she is not like them at all. She seems bright, she is funny, optimistic, and confident about herself, she just wants to have fun.

"You?"

"My favorite color?" I nod what better way to get to know a person than twenty questions. "Red."

Our conversation is cut short as Amber comes running in, or out, obviously drunk. "Lilly, where were you?" Her words are slurred and you could practically smell the alcohol on her breath. I look over at Lilly her whole posture and demeanor have changed. She doesn't like them. "What are you doing out here and with _her_?" Amber looks at me with her glazed eyes and gives me a disgusted look.

"I'll be in, in a minuet Amber." That's a good enough answer for her, supposedly, as she turns and walks away. "Sorry." Lilly stands up and takes a few steps around my chair.

"Me too." I say quietly, hopefully she did not hear me.

Lilly folds her arms across her chest and looks at me intently. "You're a complicated secretive person, aren't you Miley." She has no clue. I look at her and don't say anything. "It's okay," She looks at me up and down or in this case side to side, and smiles. "I kind of like that about you."

Without me having another saying she turns and is gone. I watch her go and smile. Well I got part of what I wanted tonight. I know her name: Lilly, I heard her voice: like velvet, I heard her laugh and giggle: like a song, and I touched her: soft. I speak to where she walked off. "I kind of like you too."

**--x--**

**Yay! She met "Truscott", or Lilly. But will she meet her again? Find out next chapter. Till then. :) **


	6. Chapter 5

**Hey guys' I know its been awhile, but I'm working on a project about the first 5 years of my life (oh the joy) for psychology, so sorry this chapter is so late, and how about that new episode last night? Lackson with def. some hints of Liley. :). Thank you all for reading and reviewing.**

**The new set up on here is a shocker for me. Is anyone else having trouble finding things? Or am I just slow?  
**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**--x--**

The party did not last that much longer for Oliver or I. Maybe an hour to an hour and half longer. I didn't see Lilly after I talked to her. Lilly. Just thinking her about her and saying her name in my head makes me smile. I finally know part of her. Know her well enough to know that she is not a clone of Amber and Ashley. There is a fire burning inside of her, she wants to get out, find a place in this world, like me, sort of.

I close my eyes and let the cool night air brush across my face. I wrap my jacket closer around me; it's colder than I though it was. There is the light sound of Oliver and my shoes tapping against the pavement. We don't talk. His hands are in his pant's pockets and walking slightly slouched over. He is probably mad at me. I pulled him away from his "future wife". I smirk to myself. Oliver is always on the hunt for the perfect girl. One who could fulfill his dreams and his image, one that is everything, one to love, but hey who isn't?

"So," Oliver turns my way his dark hair falling at an angle. "Did you score with anyone?"

I wrap my arms around myself, taking my jacket with me, and try to prevent a smile with a slight blush. Tonight "scoring" has a different meaning. I'm sure Oliver to notice to my hesitation and movement, to perk up. "Y-yeah I guess you can say that, kind of."

I smile, the blonde still burned behind my eyes, and in my memory, hopefully forever. "Really? Who?"

Oliver is eager and tilts his ear towards me so he could hear. I look out ahead of us and notice our houses are coming up. I quicken my pace until I'm close enough to get to my house without saying another word. "Her."

I keep walking leaving Oliver behind. He does not need to ask questions or follow. He knows who I am talking about, and his house is before mine, so he had no choice, unless he wanted to. I walk up my driveway and I am on a high, nothing could break me down now, now that I finally met Lilly.

I pull out my key and open the door. It's dark. Why is it dark? With sound being slower than light, I flick the light switch on and see a sight I always knew, but never wanted to see, followed with a moan. My Dad and some bimbo, on my couch, semi-naked, heating up towards sex. I'm disgusted, I want to throw up. I always knew what my Dad did, but I guess seeing it makes it a whole new picture. The girl jumps off, or falls off; my Dad landing on the floor, my Dad sits up and looks at me coldly. "What are you doing here?"

There is no authority in his voice, probably out of fright or embarrassment, I don't know. I hold back my regurgitation and fold my arms over my chest, sending a glare at my so called Father. "I live here, remember?"

My Father's girlfriend speaks up but her words fall on my deaf, but turning red, ears. "You said you were going to be out late." He stands up and grabs the blanket that is always on the couch and wrapping it around his naked body.

He is upset, yet I'm the one that should be upset. I look over to the kitchen and read the clock that is on the stove. "I thought mid-night was late?"

My Father points at me and strains his tone. "Don't talk to me like that young lady, go to your room." I roll my eyes and undo my folded arms, I don't want to talk. "We are going to talk about this young lady."

"Whatever." I mumble and make my way upstairs. I don't want to talk. I don't want to see him. I don't want to be near him. I don't him as my guardian. I don't want him taking care of me. I don't him to be my Father.

I go in my room and close the door, silently, if I did it loud I would probably get yelled at, again. I jump on my bed and grab my pillow, resting my chin on it. Then I feel it. I light but still there tear, falling from my eye, rolling down my cheek and landing on my pillow. And more follow.

I'm crying. I don't want to cry. I'm not supposed to cry. But I do. I can't take it, not anymore. I bury my head in my pillow, as it drowns in my tears and sobs. I start to shake and now I feel as if I'll throw up from crying.

He did it. I don't know if it was his intention but he did it. He got to me. He broke me. Broke my promise, my trust, and all it took was actually seeing it happening. "I wanna go home, I wanna go home." I move my face in my pillow and close my eye tight, I don't want the tears to fall but they escape behind my barrier.

Forgiveness will no longer be granted. I shall never forgive him for what he did. For what he did to me, my brother, and my Mom. I cry more. I miss them, I want them here, I want to be there with them. Why did I have to go to him? Why couldn't I stay with her? Why can't someone save me? I want to go home, I want to go home.

Please.

--x--

I move. In the night. My head shifts on my pillow to only be pulled back away. It's…cold? Why is it cold? I lift my head up and take my hand, that was underneath the pillow and drag it along the pillowcase. It's all cold, cold and…wet. Wet. Stained. Tears. My tears. My painful, the story of my life, tears. I take the pillow, gripping it tight in my hands, and fling it across the room.

Tears or anger wont help and happiness, I'll never know, or be able to obtain. I sigh. I'm too tired. Just wait. I'll just have to wait. I made a promise years ago; when I'm old enough I'm gone. I'm leaving him, this life, and this world. To find them. To be with them, happy. Live my own life…my own life.

_**(Dream)**_

"_Come on baby girl you can do it." I'm sitting on a bright pink bike. My first two wheeler. I'm scared. I don't want to do it I'll fall._

_I close my eyes and shake my head. "I can't I can't. I'm too little, I can't." I feel the hand on the bike shift to my back._

_I look at the source. She has medium length brown hair, warm dark eyes, and a pleasant smile. My Mom. "Yes you can darling, you can do it." _

_I look around. Jackson his cranking on his own back. Then he swings around. "Yeah come on Miles," He comes and pulls up next to me, stopping. "You can do it little sis, it ain't hard. I'll be right here."  
_

"_O-okay, if you are sure." He gives me a toothy grin and nods. "Let's do it Momma." My Mom smiles and starts to push the bike, holding on to me, and I start to pedal. I soon feel like a free bird. _

_Then I hear clapping. I stop and turn around. My Mom is not attached to me. "Woohoo alright baby girl I told you, you could do it." _

_I smile. "Alright Smiley." I look towards Jackson and smile._

_Then I get off my bike. "Daddy, Daddy did you see me. I did it; I did it, all by myself." I run to my Dad, with my helmet and pads, happy. _

_My Dad puts the camera down and opens his arms for me. "I saw it Bud, I saw it." My Dad picks me up in his arms with a grunt and swings me around. "I'm so proud of you." My Mom comes up from behind me and my parents hold me in there arms. Jackson soon joins in hugging Mom's legs. All smiling._

_**(End Dream)**_

"Mom?" I spring forward. Its morning. I wipe sweat from my brow, then rub my eyes. I hate those dreams. Or rather I love to hate them. It's joyful at first, but a whole mockery at me. To show what I had, what I had and lost lost it all. Everything.

I don't want to do anything today, just sleep, but my Father is looking for me. I let out a sigh. I don't bother changing or taking a shower. I do, do my hair though and head out.

--x--

It's early. Seven in the morning. Not a lot of people on the beach. I walk across the beach, breathing in the sea air, salty, crisp, new. I take my shoes off and let my toes sink into the sand.

I continue walking, I don't know where, I'm letting my feat guide the way. I don't want to go back home. Nothing will change. I walk and keep walking. Far, away from all the people.

It's secluded here, no one and nothing. I turn towards the ocean, the occasional waves hitting the sand. Then I double take. There is someone out there. Pretty dangerous to be…surfing around the secluded part of the beach, no lifeguard, yikes. I look closer.

I can see the figure, a girl, not uncommon in Malibu, blonde hair, wait…Lilly? She is riding the wave. Like she has been doing this for years, well she probably has, considering she used to live her.

I'm fascinated. Amber and Ashley will never surfer or do anything that gets them dirty, messy, and sweaty. I knew she was different. The wave is done and she has spotted me. She smiles. That a good sign? Then makes her way over to me out of the ocean.

I swallow, making my mouth dry faster. She is coming out of the water, with it dripping from her skin, her hair is wet, but it shines against the sun, and her suit is sticking to her, showing her shape. Talk about hot. I take a step back; I'm taken away not only by her, but this emotion. She comes up to me with a welcoming smile and sticks her surfboard to the ground next to her. "Miley, hey."

I open my mouth, nothing. Perfect time to shut down Stewart. I raise my hand and point at the board. "Y-you surf?" Completely ignoring her greeting and not giving one in return.

She lets out a small laugh and taps her board with her hand. "Umm yeah, I kind of do that. I mean I know it's not what Amber and Ashley are into but-"

"No." She stops and stares at me. "No its-its cool."

She looks down, maybe hiding a blush, as she pushes back her wet hair. "Thanks."

I put my hands in her pockets and swing on the heels of my feet, back and forth. I'm still in shock by this. "I would have never thought, Lilly Truscott, total 'in' girl surfs."

She walks up to me and moves her arms to the back zipper of her suit. And pulls it off. Does she realize she is torturing me? I can't help but stare. "Yeah well," She slides it off of her arms, showing her orange bikini underneath and her flat, slightly toned, stomach, then she pushes it past her thighs, her legs are pretty strong, then it is off. "I didn't think Miley Stewart…oh wait, I-I don't know what you do."

She wraps her suit up and holds it in her arms. I give her a cocky grin. "And you never will."

**--x--**

**Hmm…So what do you think? What would happy between Miley and Lilly, will there be a relationship (friend or couple)? And what about Miley's past? Find out next chapter. Till then. :) **


	7. Chapter 6

**Hey guys', thank you all for reading and reviewing. Sorry it's taking awhile, I haven't had much time to write, plus the whole new get up on here is really confusing for me (don't ask me why, I'm slow, I'll leave it at that). Enjoy. **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**--x--**

I spin around and start to walk away. "Miley," I turn to look behind me, still walking, and see Lilly approaching me. "Wait up."

I smile. If I can keep her interested in me, then maybe I'll have a chance. "What's up?"

"N-nothing, I uh…" My smile grows, giving me a toothy grin. She spots me. "What?"

"Nothing, just…nothing." She still looks at me but I turn away and we continue to walk, in silence.

We make our way off the beach and on to our road, her house is approaching, and no words have been exchanged between us. But I'm comfortable with the silence. "So?" I turn to give her a quick flash then look away. "Y-you going to homecoming?"

I smirk. "Like I would be caught dead there." I never went to homecoming; it's the perfect dance for the rejects to feel like rejects and the popular kids to have a great time. The captain of the cheerleader team will win homecoming queen and the captain of the football team will win homecoming king. Why go to watch the ego kids get bigger egos?

"So where can someone catch you alive that night?" Hmm…clever.

"Why?" We are now in front of her house and stop. We are at the end of the driveway I turn around to look at her and she stops to look at me.

"I don't know just curious I guess."

I bite on my lower lip and nod. "Curiosity killed the cat," I take a step closer, so are faces are a few inches apart. I can see her stiffen and slight fear rises in her eyes. "Especially when he crossed paths with me."

She swallows her face stone; I smile and walk away. Knowing I left her stunned and thinking about me. I want her focus on me and away from Amber and Ashley. I want her interested in me just as much as I'm interested in her. 'Course an almost death threat probably was not the way to go, but I'll take my chances.

--x--

I can't go home so I continue walking; I don't know where, just wherever my feet take me. I try to clear my mind, all my thoughts, get rid of the bad, save room for the good. But how?

What are thoughts? An event that happens during the day, you can't shake. You have to relate it to something it has to come from somewhere. How do you clear an empty mind? Your mind is like a Ferris wheel, always turning, one thought after another, when one reaches the top you remember, when it goes back down you forget, when it stops you are in a fog. The human body is one amazing thing. Really think about it. Your intestines are so long they could go for miles. You have layers beyond layers of skin and your fingerprints are on every single layer.

God is one artist. Sure anyone can tell you that. The rise and setting sun, the colors that splash across the sky, the way the leaves change in fall, and snow, there is nothing whiter than snow. We live in amazing place, to bad we are doing poorly to preserve it.

--x--

I stop. I don't know where I am. Some park on another side of town. I find a bench and sit. What more thinking could I do today? "Miles."

My head snaps at the name of my sound. "Oliver?"

Oliver is riding his skateboard, but hop offs, taking off his helmet, and sitting down. I tried skating once. Did not go so well. I always thought it was so cool all those tricks you could do, in the air. I wanted to try them. So I did. I don't think I'm one of those people who give up easily but skateboarding is something I dropped quickly. I tried months even. I could not grip it. Oliver said I was a lost cause and I believed him. "What're you doing here?"

I put one leg over my other and look out over the park. "Avoiding home." Oliver places his arm on my shoulder and squeezes it tightly. I give him a small smile.

"Two more years." I know, I know two more years, but they are not coming fast enough. Little things that my Dad does, not only make me think about what he just did, but about others as well. I think of everything. My whole past comes back and I see no good. I could only remember the bad.

I look down, thinking again, I feel tears prick my eyes; I refuse to let them fall. I just want it to stop. All the bad things. Why? Why is it I remember more bad than good? Do good things not happen that often for me? Well yeah, but there was a time I was happy, and like I said I could not remember it. I want to, I'm dieing to, maybe that could define who I am, what I am. I don't even know. I haven't found my true calling yet. I have this empty void, I want it filled…with happiness. "I know."

Oliver removes his arm and decides to spark up another conversation. "Hey you want to go to homecoming? You don't need to dress up; a lot of people go casual."

"Oliver I really don't-" Lilly. Lilly might go, or she should go, and if I show up after what I just said it will totally throw her off. "I really don't know how I could pass that up."

Oliver raises his eyebrow. I did a complete one-eighty. I'm probably scaring him. "Ookay, tonight, eight see you there." He gets up to walk away and I'm staring off into space, smiling, heck I'm scaring myself.

--x--

I go home, carefully. I walk around the whole house, listening for everything, and looking to see if any lights are on. No sound and no light. My Dad is gone. Yes! He'll go out he'll forget and I'll get away.

I walk in and run upstairs. I only have a half hour before Oliver and I have to go to homecoming. Amber's party I looked forward to, this I ain't so crazy about. I spend twenty something minutes fixing up and changing. Ready to go out.

I bound down the stairs and I see Oliver coming up my driveway. I open the door and walk past him. "Hey Ollie." Oliver stops, and looks from my house to where I am walking.

He turns around and walks up beside me. "Jeez Miles, I don't know what this Truscott girl has done with you but I think its turning into a good thing."

"She is doing nothing Oliver." She can't. I don't change. I have been this way for nine years. Maybe that is an exaggeration, but I don't remember being anything other than whom and what I am. "Let's go."

--x--

Oliver and I enter the dance. People are everywhere, dancing, talking, and doing nothing. There is a rumor about a big party later on. No teachers, no adults, and all alcohol. I scan the crowd for a certain blonde. Do I want to do that? Do I want to look eager? I shouldn't. I said I wouldn't be caught dead here so why should I act like I want to be.

I walk over to the tables and let Oliver go his merrily way. Again I'm alone. I look at the waves of people dancing. Teachers or the supervisors are pretty strict here, that is probably why there is a bigger, better party after. We will be free to do what we want. Here we can not dance that close, well you could dance close, but if you start a grinding train, you are done for.

I still search the crowd for Lilly. I have never been to homecoming, so I don't really know how things work. "Vote for homecoming king and queen?" Some kid, with red curly hair, jumps in front of my view, holding a piece of paper. Better to go along with him and not argue. I snatch the paper and think. Do I really want to boost these kids's self-esteem? Do I want to see them happy and be king and queen of the world? Bring there hopes up? Cause after high school they will be the ones at the bottom of the food chain, working for us. I smile. Yes. I'll do it. Let them have their time now, and later they will be the ones to die old. I scribble on the paper and hand it back to the kid. "Thanks."

He walks away with a smile on his face, looking for other people to ask. I turn back in front of me, totally unprepared, Lilly is standing there, she is wearing a simple dress, her arms are folded across her chest and she has a smirk on her face. She walks up to me, hovering over me, sneakiness in her eyes, and talks. "Well I would have never thought, Miley Stewart, to be here at homecoming, should I phone the morgue?"

I raise my eyebrow and give her a smirk. She is good. One reason I know she is not another Amber or Ashley. "Funny Truscott, but I wouldn't test your limits."

She drops her arms and pulls up a chair next to me. "What makes you think your tests are challenging enough for me?" Whoa feisty. I might break my limit before she breaks hers.

I know I need to gain control back but I look like a fool now. My mouth is open and I'm sure I'm wide eyed. "I-I-" I lost the ability to talk, perfect. I clear my throat and try again. "I would love to have a battle of the wits with you Truscott, but you seemed to be unarmed."

Her eyebrows knit together and she fixes her posture in her seat, carefully drawing in a breath and letting it out slowly. "Well I'm sure you can agree as much as I that stupidity should be a painful thing."

"Exactly…wait," Now my eyebrows knit together and I have to think. "What?" She smiles and lets out a light. Causing a smile to rise on my lips. "Did you just insult me or did I just insult myself?"

Her blue eyes shine with the happiness coming from her laugh. "I think both, although I'm pretty sure I insulted myself in the process." I let a small giggle and she does to. Making me stop and stare at her. A smile forms on my lips. The whole world stops. The people around us are just blending into colors and all my focus is on her.

She stops laughing and looks at me, staring at her. She lets a small smile hang on her lips and speaks softly. "What?"

I respond in the same tone. "Nothing." She is different. She makes me feel different. She makes me feel good, important. Maybe she is what I have been looking for; maybe she is the piece to the puzzle, that one person to fill in the void.

"Miley?" I blink and shake my head. Guess I completely zoned out. "Did you hear me?" I nod my head 'no' with my lips in a thin line. Now I feel bad, she was talking and I was daydreaming. "It's okay, I was just wondering if you were going to the party after."

I shrug my shoulders. How many parties are there going to be this month? "Umm…are you?"

I bit on the inside of my cheek. No matter how hard I try, I can't be my normal self around her. I want her to like me. I want to be my best for her. I don't want to be my usual self. "There is a good chance I might show, up, considering Ashley is having it."

Ahh…her "friend". "Well maybe if Oliver is going, I might stop by." I still have to stay clear away from my Dad. By tomorrow we should be on the level we once were: zero. But that is fine with me. He will find some one to knock up and I'll go have fun of my own.

**--x--**

**Okay, well to me that seemed pretty blah, but you can't rush these things. So will Miley show up at the party? Will things ever get better between her and her Dad? And is she having any effect on Lilly or is Lilly having a bigger effect on her? Find out in the next chapter. Till then. :). **


	8. Chapter 7

**Hey guys' thank you so much for still reading and reviewing, especially when the updates are like a week apart. Thank You so much and please enjoy. :) **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**--x--**

Homecoming is over. The seniors acted like the typical seniors. They rule everyone else drools. That was the nice way to put. I decided to go to the party. Oliver was having no doubts in his mind at all about going. He found the girl he was with at Amber's party and he was hoping to score and I was hoping to talk to Lilly more.

We separated during the walk to the party. Oliver went with his new girl and I went my own way. I entered late. Time to catch some fresh air and think. All this is new to me. All the stuff with Lilly anyway. I never felt as if I ever really needed to be next or with somebody before. It's kind of scary and thrilling at the same time, I like it. But I don't know what to do or how to control it. I'm just going to have to roll with.

I enter the party and it is pretty much the duplicate of Amber's. Although I think more people are becoming drunk quicker and having sex faster. Probably from homecoming. That thing was so boring, I was falling asleep, even with the booming music, remind me to never go to homecoming again.

I walk through the crowd when I feel someone's hand touch my arm. I jolt. "Whoa, sorry." It's Lilly. "I didn't mean to scare you. Glad you made it."

I itch my arm, where she touched, knowing it was her sent butterflies fly through my body, giving me a strange feeling, it tingles, but it feels good. "No, it's okay."

Lilly smiles and nods, she raises her hand, and I notice she has a beer cup, she takes a sip. I know I usually have my one or two beers and I think that is okay, but seeing her drink that makes me want to stop. It doesn't seem right; she looks so innocent, and from the little I know from her seems that way too. It looks completely wrong; I want to grab the drink from her hand and throw it on the ground, grab her hands and look into her eyes, to tell her not to do that. I start to speak up when I'm interrupted.

"Lilly what are you…" Amber comes from behind and stops talking when she spots me. She looks me up and down then folds her arms over her chest, giving me a disgusted look. "What are you doing here Stinky Stewart?"

Lilly looks at Amber in disbelief. "Amber."

Amber ignores Lilly and doesn't take her eyes off of me. I fold my arms over my chest and lean on one leg; I'm not going anywhere. "Haven't you already ruined infested my party enough, you don't need to spread you virus to others."

"Amber stop." Lilly cuts in front of me, blocking Amber from me.

Amber looks dead at Lilly and lets out a laugh. "C'mon on Lilly get real, look at her," Lilly turns around and looks me up and down. My skin grows hot, she may just be looking at me but I take it as her checking me out, and that sort of made me uncomfortable. "She is not one of us, she is at the bottom and we are at the top." Lilly goes from my lower body to my upper looking at my face, she gave me an apologetic one.

I finally decide to speak up. I don't want Amber "helping" my whatever you want to call it relationship with Lilly. "Maybe I better go."

I start to go but Lilly grabs my arm and the feeling is back. "No Miley wait." I stop and turn to her she gently slides her hand away from my arm, giving me goose bumps.

Amber decides to speak up against Lilly action. "What is going on Lilly, you aren't actually friends with her, are you?"

This here is a defining moment. Lilly looks at me then back at Amber; we are starting to create quite the scene. "No," She failed. Lilly turns to me and totally ignores Amber. "But I'd like to be." Scratch that she passed. I smile and Lilly mirrors it.

Amber looks in totally shock. Once you are "in" you don't ever want to get out. People worship the ground the popular kids walk on and Lilly just trampled over it. She has no retort so she just scoffs and walks away. Probably to find Ashley and tell her Lilly is out.

The small crowd around us soon back to partying and Lilly reaches out for my arms again. "Come on." She pulls me and drags me through the crowd of people, up the stairs, and into a room. I walk in and Lilly closes the door behind us. I walk around, feeling uncomfortable. "Sorry."

I look at her and she is leaning up against the door. "For what? You didn't do anything, you stuck up for me and stayed with me, no one has done that in along time." I don't look at her I turn around and let my fingers glide across a shelf, perfectly smooth wood.

"Your welcome?" I turn to look at her and smile. Making my way over to the bed and sit, still looking around the room. "Are you okay?"

No. "Yes." Something is bothering me, I doubt she can tell. It's just a simple question. If she doesn't really like Amber and Ashley all that much, why did she go with them in the first place?

"Are you sure?" She makes her way over to me on the bed and sits down. I look down at my hands before looking at her.

"Well actually can I ask you something?" She looks at me and slowly nods her head. Probably afraid of my question. "Why did you choose Amber and Ashley in the first place, if-if you don't really like them?"

She is taken aback. She looks away from me. "I don't know." She stands up and starts to walk around the room. "I guess I was desperate y'know? I was the new kid, I was worried about fitting in, I was desperate for that one person to like me. I was scared of everyone hating me, and not wanting to be friends with the new girl. Then Amber and Ashley came and I guess I just jumped at the chance to have friends."

Great, so all this time while I was admiring her from afar, all I had to do was walk up and say: 'Hi I'm Miley want to be friends?' and she would have jumped at the chance. Well I guess it doesn't matter, we are becoming friends…I think. "I guess I could understand."

She stops pacing and smiles. "Umm d-do you mind if I ask you a question?" I shake my head 'no'. "Okay well why-why do Amber and Ashley hate you?"

"In all honesty I do not know, I guess its just a hobby for them." Amber and Ashley always had it in for me and I never knew why. I didn't do anything to them, one day they just decided to harass me, like I didn't get that enough at home.

Silence falls between both of us one there is a thud at the door. That was not your normal knock. I stand up and Lilly looks at me she raises her arms to signal that she has no clue and my attention is back on the door. It then swings open and a couple or one-night stand comes into the room kissing. The boy opens his eyes and spots Lilly and I. "Oh sorry."

The girl stops molesting him and from his voice I recognize him. "Oliver?"

"Miley?" Oliver is out of breath and starts to laugh slightly. "I'm ha, I'm sorry I di-didn't know you were-umm-that-anybody for that matter was in here, I uh, I'll be going now." Oliver bolts out of the room, dragging his girl with him.

"What is he like your boyfriend or something?" There is disappointment in her voice, but I shouldn't jump to conclusions. Lilly must have seen Oliver and me together, a lot, I guess it's easy to assume we are dating but I find it ridiculous. I turn to her and start laughing.

"Oliver and me, ha, heck no, never, I can even picture me doing anything with that doughnut." Lilly smiles and I see relief from her eyes. I calm down and move back over to the bed, sitting down. "He is more like a brother, family really."

Then it hits me. My face falls and my eyes grow wide. "Miley? Miley you okay?" Lilly walks to the bed and sits beside me, placing a hand on my arm. "Miley?"

My family. Where I come from. Lilly can't, she would never accept me. How could she? We are from two different worlds. How would she feel if she knew about my past and what my present life was like? Oliver doesn't even know, yet he has an idea. He is always there for me and knows I resent my Father, but he does not care.

What would happen if Lilly found out? Found out about my history my life. I don't want to put that burden on her. I don't want her to worry, to try and make it better, to take care of me. What would she think of me? We are too different. She is obviously rich and I am not. What would happen if she found out about my Father? Would she see me as just like him? "I have to go."

I stand up and get ready to leave but Lilly block's my path. "What why?"

I'm worried, I'm scared. I finally realize I don't want her to find out about me. I don't want her to know. I can't, friend or not. My past is my past and I try to keep it that way, even though my Father reminds me every single day. I'm ashamed of myself. "I don't think I can't do this."

I walk forward and she walks with me. "Do what?" I don't speak; I try to get by her. She puts her hands up against my arms and lightly holds me back. "Do what? Tell me?"

"I-I," I try not to look anywhere but her desperate eyes. "I don't think we could be friends."

She lets her hands fall and takes a step back. "Why?"

This is not fun. She just ditched her old friends and now I'm leaving her. Her voice sounds hurt and her face matches. I can't handle this. I don't want to hurt her, I'm protecting her, she just doesn't realize it. "It's complicated, it's too hard."

"What's too hard?" I shake my head and make my way past her. "Miley!" I bolt out of the room and run down the stairs knowing she is right behind me. I push through the dancing crowd, making it an advantage for me and disadvantage for her. I find my way out and I'm gone.

**--x--**

**Umm…usually I have something to say here, but I can't think of anything so I guess I'll just see you guys' next chapter. Till then. :). **


	9. Chapter 8

**Okay, well here we are with another chapter. Thank you all for reading and reviewing, they always have a way of making me smile. Please enjoy. **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**--x--**

I walk into the cool night air and say nothing but curse words towards myself. I was stupid. I left Oliver with some girl and we never leave a party without the other, and I just ditched Lilly after a few minuets of friendship. Why me? What is my purpose in life, what am I suppose to do on this Earth? What is God's plan for me?

I walk home, reluctantly, but I do it anyway. The house is dark; I guess my Father still is not home. I open the front door and slam it. I couldn't be angrier at myself. Then a light flicks on and I jump about twenty feet in the air. "Oh my God!" I place a hand over my heart and my eyes adjust to the new light. I see my Father standing by the light switch. "What the hell?"

"Where were you?" My Father folds his arms over his chest and looks at me square in the eye.

"Out." I gain back my composure and start to head up the stairs.

"Out? Don't walk away young lady you have to explain." I'm halfway up the stairs and I know he is following.

"Cut it out Dad," I turn around and his eyes widen at my outburst. "Stop pretending like you care, you don't! You go all around town tapping every slut you see sometimes for the whole weekend," My anger starts to rise and I know I should calm down before I lose control, but I can't stop, I want him to realize, to hurt like I hurt, feel what I feel. "You are never around, you are not a Father, you're just someone temporary in my life until I'm ready to get out of here-" Before I realize it my back hits the stairs and I cry out in pain.

I tumble down a few stairs and land just in front of my Father. My right eye hurts, bad. I look up at him, tears evident in my eyes. He looks shocked, amazed, he doesn't know what to do. "Mile I…"

His voice is calm, but I'm done, this time I mean it. "Save it," I stand up and hold up my hand, creating distance between us. "I'm done with you Dad." I turn and run up the rest of the stairs and head into my room. I land on my bad, chin on my pillow, and look at a picture of my Mom and me, smiling and happy. I feel my right I swell and feel as if it would blow up with eye juice, but tears are also following. "I miss you Mom."

Why did she let me go with him? Why didn't she take me? Does she even love me? Think about me? Wonder how am doing? Does she ever want to come and find me? And if so what is taking her so long?

--x--

I'm back in the Twilight zone. Doing the same thing I have been doing since school started. My Dad tries to talk to me, but I ignore him, Lilly tries to catch my eyes, but I avert them. Oliver had tried the best he can to talk to me, but I say nothing. I am now a walking zombie. I'm gone. I've lost. I've lost my happiness, I've lost my pride, and I've lost everything. Nothing and no one can save me; I'm falling, falling with no safety net, ready to crash.

About three days have passed. My eye is doing slightly better, but boy did my Father give me a good one. Oliver told me I should report it, its child abuse, but I don't, and I threaten him if he ever thinks about it. The first day I came back I noticed Lilly, she noticed my eye, she was going to come up to me and talk, but stopped herself, remembering what I said.

I ruined everything. I start to get something good and I ruin it. That is just my luck, my life. Nothing good should happen to me.

--x--

The fourth day I don't know if it's Wednesday or Thursday, but it's the forth day since I became fully empty. "Sup Miles?" Oliver puts his lunch tray down and lifts his head up in greeting. Silence. "How are you?" I say nothing. I don't even look at him, I look through him. I glance to my right and see Lilly eating lunch with Saint Sarah, totally unlikely pair. Oliver sees my shift in gaze and looks over at the blonde. "Talk to her."

For the split second Oliver barraged into the room with this girl and quickly ran out he saw I was with Lilly. "No." My voice is…hoarse? Raspy? I don't know just plain creepy.

"Why not?" Nothing, again. "Damn it Miley!" Oliver's voice raises and he slams the lunch table, drawing attention, I could kill him later. "I can't take this, I can't take you like this anymore, I know you weren't the jolliest person ever, and didn't have the easiest life, but you were funner than this." Oliver waves his hands around me. "I want that Miley back."

"Don't you think I'm aware of that?!" The whole cafeteria is now looking and listening to our conversation. I'm embarrassed, I hate what I have become, what I was, who I am. "I would love to go back, but I can't Oliver! I can't!" I stand up and walk away slamming the cafeteria doors in front of me.

School is done for me for the day; I'm too embarrassed to go back. Besides there is only about an hour left. And I'm hurt, I just screamed at my best friend, the only one who cares, and wants to help me.

I leave the school and walk around. Somehow I end up at the beach. I sit letting my hands travel through the sand and look out into the ocean, trying to relax. "What is happening to me?" I'm in a swirling vortex of doom.

I soon feel as if I'm being watched, then I hear footsteps and someone sitting next to me. I turn my head and close my eyes, I don't want to talk, not even to Oliver, I'll apologize later, right now I need space. "Hey."

I open my eyes to the soft voice that does not belong to Oliver. I turn my head and see blonde hair and blue eyes. "L-Lilly?" She smiles and my heart warms. "What're you doing here?"

She stretches her hands out in the sand and folds her legs, Indian style. "I-I came to see if you were okay." I turn my head away and look out into the ocean, but still feeling her gaze on me. Lilly doesn't know me. She doesn't realize when I want to be alone, you leave me alone. "So…you okay?"

She is sincere, I can hear it. I turn to look at her; I take in all of her facial features and have my eyes move down all the way to her legs, then back out into the ocean. She waits for my reply. "I just wanna be alone."

"Okay, but if you need to talk you know where to find me." She stands up and brushes off her pants and butt and starts walking away.

"Lilly wait!" Fear strikes my heart and panic takes over my body. She turns around as I turn around to look at her. She pauses and stares at me. Her hair blowing in the wind and she is desperately pulling it back. I don't want her to go. When she is around I feel different. Invincible, safe. Maybe I should not push away the person who could save me. "Don't go." She gives me a small soft smile and makes her way back over to me and sits down. I probably won't say anything, but she is here, by my side, and I don't want her to go.

**--x--**

**This seems like a good place to end it. Anyway, are things finally turning around for Miley, and will her and Lilly become closer? Find out next chapter. Till then.**


	10. Chapter 9

**Holy Cow has it been awhile. Sorry, but there was good reason. I got really sick. I could not eat and was throwing everything up, and for a person who has a phobia of throwing up, it was not fun. I lost about ten pounds after I got better but had no energy in me at all, I was too weak. Then when I got better I got sick again. But as of now I am 100% healthy. **

**I'm sorry you guys, this chapter really isn't the greatest, but hey it's something right?**

**Thank You all for the reviews and everything. After I got better I went back and read all of them, that def. made me feel better and put a smile on my face. Thank You all.  
**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**--x--**

The sun is setting, we have been sitting here for awhile and I start to worry about Lilly's parents. Wouldn't they wonder where their daughter is? And how come she did not come home after school? They sky turns a golden orange and yellow, it sort of reminds me of the endless sky in Tennessee, I miss it, I miss her and I even miss Jackson.

I sigh. Lilly turns and looks at me. God has she been patient. Hours have gone by and not a word has been spoken. But what do I say to her. I begged, almost cried. I showed vulnerability. I'm never vulnerable, why with Lilly? Oh right, I like her.

But what do you say after you are broken. After you are damaged. How can you fix ten years of a mistake? "M-Miles?" I close my eyes; not yet Lilly. Lilly must have read my thoughts and closes her mouth, looking back out into the ocean.

The sun has set and Lilly is still here with me. The moon is up and stars are dancing in the sky. My eyes move up to look at the stars and then drift towards Lilly, with her finger playing in the sand. Don't ask me why, but I feel better. Kind of. Lilly must have felt my stare, because she turns to look at me, and lets a small smile creep on her lips. My eyes avert to her perfect lips, how I want to brush them with my own, but I don't, and give her a weak smile in return.

Then I stand, stretch, and brush myself off, free of sand. Lilly does the same thing, hesitantly. "Thank you." Is all I say, she nods, and I walk away.

"Miley?" I turn to look at her. "If you ever need to talk…"

"I know Lilly, Thanks." She nods again with a soft smile. And I turn to walk home.

--x--

My house is empty and dark. I don't know where my Father is and frankly I don't care. I go up to my room, not turning on any lights and plop on my bed. I look to my side and see a picture of my Mom. Looking at it more in detail, as best as I could in this light. And notice a cross necklace.

My family used to be very religious; I guess you can say we lost our way. I have never found God; I started to have doubts, and apparently so did my Father, so we just stopped. I sit up and take the picture. Tracing the outline of my Mom's face with my finger. Then I put the picture back down and thought about praying…So I did.

--x--

I wake up. My feet are dangling on the wrong side of the bed; I must have fallen asleep praying. It was weird; I have not done it in a long time. I remember talking to Him for about and hour, then I guess I fell asleep.

I rubbed my eyes and look at my clock. 8:59 AM. Seconds tick by and now it is nine in the morning, my alarms sounds off. It must be the weekend, Saturday. My alarm is programmed for weekdays and weekends. Considering the little sleep I got I feel energized. Like a weight was lifted or something. I don't think much of it as I head to my bathroom for as shower.

--x--

My Father still is not home. But it does not bother me, it happens, maybe not to everyone but it happens. I walk down my sidewalk and spot Lilly's house. A smile spreads on my face. I cross the street. With a strange burst of confidence and knock on her door.

She did say whenever I need to talk. And I do want to talk. I want to be friends. If she could save me from falling, maybe she could remind me how to fly again. A middle-aged woman opens the door. She has blonde hair and tired blue eyes, must be Lilly's Mother. "Umm…Hi, Mrs. Truscott, I was wondering if Lilly was home."

There goes my confidence. The woman tilts her head and smiles. "You must be Miley?" Shock must have spread across my face. "My daughter has mentioned you a couple times, nice to finally meet you." She sticks her hand out and I shake it. Lilly has talked about me? "I'm Heather." I nod and smile.

"Who's at the door honey?" An older man, guessing the same age as Heather pops up from around the door. He had light brown hair and warm brown eyes. He is fixing his tie, probably getting ready for work, and kisses Heather on the cheek.

"This is Miley Dave. Miley this is David, my husband." Heather steps aside so I could see David fully.

He smiles, he has Lilly's smile. And extends his hand. "Well nice to meet you Miley." I tell him nice to meet him as well. "I think you will be able to find Lilly at the skate park," I smile; I still don't see how Lilly got in with Amber and Ashley. "I'm heading out on business; I could drop you by if you like." I agree.

--x--

I'm in the seat of Mr. Truscott's car and the radio is silently playing. I look out the window straight ahead of me. It's been quiet. I see out of my peripheral vision that Mr. Truscott is looking at my hair and dress, categorizing me. "So Miley," I turn my head and look at him. Hopefully he is not too judgmental. "What do you do for fun, what are your hobbies and or interests?

I look at Mr. Truscott, honestly I don't really no. My attire would probably give away that I am a bum. I'm lazy I do nothing. But I can't tell him that. So I think back to the little past that I could remember. "Umm…well I'm really into writing, and I like to play the guitar and piano."

Mr. Truscott smiles and nods his head. "Why that is very good. You are musically based, not many people are y'know. I think that is a wonderful thing. It disappoints me that schools are taking away art programs, such as music, and put more money towards sports. Music is such a great thing. I remember how we tried to get Lilly into singing."

I turn my head back out to the window and smile, I can't picture Lilly singing. "Really?"

Mr. Truscott laughs it is deep and warm. "Yep, for about three weeks, she kept telling us how horrible she is, but we kept pushing her, thinking she was just lazy. But when we went to a recital, boy we knew she was not kidding, and made her drop it. So now she is into sports, and never did anything musically again."

I give Mr. Truscott a smile and a light laugh. He pulls me over by the gate to the skate park and lets me get out. I thank him. He drives away and I watch until the car is gone. I like Lilly's parents. They seem happy. I wish my parents were still like that.

I turn around and enter the skate park. For a Saturday morning it is pretty flooded, I guess. I walk and look around. Then I spot Oliver. He is talking to somebody, laughing, and happy, but I can't make out whom. I walk closer. Oliver spots me and smiles. His friend notices and turns to look around and smiles when they spot me. Lilly. Oliver walks past Lilly and comes up towards me, with our handshake. "Sup, Miles, what are you doing here?"

Lilly follows close behind and greets me with and hello. "I-uh-just came to uh see-so you guys met?" I motion between Oliver and Lilly.

Oliver looks at Lilly and she returns his stare and they share a smile. He wraps his arm around her and pulls her close to his body. I swallow hard. Oliver knows I have feelings for Lilly, so what the hell is he doing. "Yep, it turns out we have a lot in common."

Lilly wraps her arm around him and pulls him too. I find it hard to breath. I know jealousy is burning in my blood, best friends don't go and snake a girl you like, it's like against the rules. Lilly chimes in laughing. "Yeah who knew?" Lilly looks at me and smiles and I give her a smile back, to fake I'm happy. "Hey, I'll be right back I'm just going to get a drink."

Oliver and I nod our heads, and she detaches herself from Oliver. I look at Oliver and punch him in the shoulder. "Ow, what was that for."

Oliver looks at me with questioning eyes as he rubs his now sore shoulder. "What the hell was that?" Oliver looks at me like he has no clue what I'm talking about. I roll my eyes and fold my arms. "It looked like you were about to flirt with her."

"Miley chill, I would never, you like her, I could never do that." Oliver hits the end of his skateboard with his foot, so the other end springs forward allowing him to catch it. "Besides, I get a sister vibe from her, noting more. We were actually just talking about how we could all be friends, y'know the Three Musketeers?"

My facial features loosen. I don't want just be friends with Lilly, I want to be more, but friends are what we are going to have to start off with. "I'm sorry Oliver, I-" Oliver puts his hand on my shoulder and gives me a knowing look. He understands.

"Talk to her." Oliver gives my shoulder a squeeze and skates away. I turn my head and see Lilly walking towards me with a water bottle in her hand.

She drops her skateboard and unclips her helmet taking it off, then shakes her blonde hair out. "Hey Miles, so what's up?" I just look at her, I wonder if she questions yesterday. I wonder what she thinks about me. Everything.

Can I do it? Can I let someone new in and trust them? With everything?

--x--

**Well there you have it, sorry about the delay, I felt you guys' should be introduced to Lilly's Parents. Don't worry I start writing right away so the next chapter will be up soon. Till then. :)**


	11. Chapter 10

**Hey guys', sorry this would have been up sooner if we did not have two snow storms and then an ice storm causing half the town to lose power, twice. New England, gotta love it. Anywho, thank you all so much for reading and reviewing, glad to see some of you are still reading and enjoying the story. Please, enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**--x--**

'What's up?' A lot is up, yet my life is turned upside down. I'm starting to feel like my Father abandoned me, my mother and brother are far away back home happy, people generally stay away from me given my reputation, I have a hard exterior but my interior is deteriorating, and I have a crush on you. But other than all that, I think I'm okay.

I stare at Lilly and she waits as for the answer to her question, while taking a sip of her water. I shrug my shoulder and shake my head. "Nothing."

She pulls the water bottle away from her mouth and gives me a soft warm smile. "I guess that's a good thing." She twists the cap back on the water bottle and drags her skateboard next to a bench and she sits down.

I follow suit and sit a good length away from her. My attention drawn to the other skaters' dong all these flip and tricks. Man I wish I could skateboard, considering Lilly skates as well.

"So?" My attention is back on Lilly. She has a lost and confused expression on her face. Probably wondering what I'm doing here. I obviously don't fit in and stick out like a sore thumb.

"Do you want to go for a walk on the beach?" Out of nowhere my mouth over powers my brain and I speak. I turn my face away and wonder where that came from. Lilly raises her eyebrows and lowers them, but says she would like that. I look back at her and give her a small smile. And we get up and go.

As I leave I turn to find Oliver and wave him off. He spots me and gives me thumbs up with a ridiculous face to match, wishing me to get lucky. I then stick my tongue out and flip him off. I don't want to push Lilly into anything yet. Considering we are not even best friends.

--x--

We stopped by Lilly's house to drop her skate stuff of, but oddly she would not let me in, so I waited outside. But now we are side by side with are bare feet sliding through the sand. "Is something bothering you Miles?"

Yes. "No." I stuff my hands in my pocket and feel my iPod resting in there. I don't even remember grabbing it as I left. I take a headphone out and pop it in my right ear, turning it on and music fills the silence that falls upon us. "I just, y'know thought, that now especially you and Oliver are becoming friends, that we should-"

"Become friends by getting to know each other more?" I turn to look at her, she is smiling, is she ever sad?

"Yeah." Lilly nods her head and we keep walking.

"Okay…so, you are Miley Stewart, you are sixteen years old, have brown hair, with streaks of blue at the bangs, I think you have blue eyes, you don't follow the crowd, and your favorite color is blue." Lilly finishes off with pride in her face.

Don't ask me why but that just made me smile. "And you, Lilly Truscott, are also sixteen, but with a car, have blonde hair that sometimes looks golden in certain lighting, you do have blue eyes, you are different in your own way, and your favorite color is red." Lilly turns to me with a shine in her eye and they match the brightness in her now smile. "And you always smile."

Lilly laughs. "Hey you only live once might as well go through it with a sense of humor right? I mean who knows what could happen to you after you die?"

"True but if you do everything for the thrill and it's all bad you might end up as a next door neighbor to the devil, where if you are good, but enjoy never then you have a seat at God's table."

"A win-lose or lose-win situation." I look down at me feet sinking into the sand with every step that I take. For some odd reason I have the feeling that Lilly just gets me. "So…what else do I not know about the Miley Stewart."

"Many a things my friend many a things." I like this, just talking, and it gives me a chance to get to know Lilly.

"Like what?" I smile, the way Lilly said that sounded like a little kid learning something new.

"Well ummm…" What can I tell her? I look up towards the sky and wonder. Maybe I should play it safe. Just because one person knows everything about me, Oliver, does not mean everyone should know right away. So I decide just to go with the things I already told her Father. "I like to write, I play the guitar and piano. And I am a beast at video games."

Lilly laughs. And I reach into my pocket and turn my iPod off. Lilly's voice is more musical than any song. "Wow, maybe you could play something for me sometime?"

I panic. I haven't touched a piano or picked up a guitar in years, let alone written anything. "Y-yeah sure. Now how about you." Its just a little white lie, its not like she will remember or it will come up in the future.

"Let's see I love skateboarding, I am musically illiterate, and I could cook a mean spaghetti and meatball dish."

A slight smirk spreads across my face. "Total opposites then?"

"Well they do attract." I sure hope so Lilly. "But I doubt we are total opposites. Come on what is your favorite music?"

--x--

Lilly and I walked and talked pretty much the rest of the afternoon. And we learned we are opposites. But according to Lilly that is perfectly fine. For where one of us is weak the other is strong. Our differences balance each other out to make it completely balanced. We started to head back to our house and we are not outside Lilly's front door. She pulls out her keys and unlocks her door open it then stepping inside.

I stay on the outside staring back at her as she leans against the door, one hand on the knob on the inside, and the other resting on the outside. I catch her looking me up and down and her eyes catch a gleam in them, I would never know what. "So," I guess it's time for one last question. "What is the greatest thing to ever happen to you?"

I look at Lilly, but avoid her eyes. It felt so great to be with her. She made me feel comfortable, accepted, I jumped out of my old element and entered a new I love completely. So much has happened in such a little time I just want to skip the friendship thing and dive right into a relationship. But I can't. I still don't know if she swings my way. I look at her and smile. "When I became friends with Lillian Elizabeth Truscott," Shock comes across her face, we may start off as being friends but that does not mean I can not drop hints. "Goodnight Lilly."

I turn to walk away, my spirits high. "'Night Miles." I hear faintly Lilly's voice then the close of her door, and I smile.

--x--

I open the door to my house and go straight to my room. My Father is still not back yet. It still to early to go to bed so I decide to pray. I kneel at the end of my bed and make the sign of the cross. Then I look up towards the sky, or in this case my ceiling and talk. "God? Hi, let me just tell you about this girl Lilly Truscott…"

"…so if there is anything that…I don't know you could do, a sign, anything. I would really appreciate at, I mean I don't ask you for much, probably because I lost my way but I want something good in my life." I look straight ahead and blink my eyes rapidly feeling tears ready to fall. "God, I-I don't want to hurt anymore." I close my eyes and tears fall. "I want to be happy; I want to know what that feels like." I swallow the lump in my throat but it returns all too quickly. "I guess I just want something I could believe in, considering everything that I loved and trusted was pretty much taken away from me. So please God, do me this one favor? I mean You created us right? You love us, so how could You ban someone from loving? Please forgive for all that I have done. Amen."

I make the sign of the cross and sit up from the floor. I head over to my dresser ready to change into my pajamas when I stumble upon a notebook. I pull it out, and look through the pages, its blank. Confused I place the notebook on top of my desk and head over to my closet, considering my pajamas were not in my dresser I probably hung them up in my closet.

I open my closet doors, but I find nothing. I step inside and walked around until something hard fell on me. "Fuck!" I pick up the source of my pain and realize it is my old Fender Starcaster acoustic. God has a ridiculous sense of humor. I pull the guitar out and brush off all the dust. I walk over to my bed and strum the guitar with my thumb. It's out of tune, but I should be able to tune it. I then look up at the notebook I put on desk and smile. I did say to Lilly I write and play something for her some day. Why not start?

**--x--**

**Okay. Well…there it is then. Now we begin the world of friendship as Miley tries her best to win Lilly's heart. Till then :). **


	12. Chapter 11

**Hey guys' yeah it's been awhile, but when your computer gets a virus then you get the flu that can happen. This would have been up two or three days ago, but I guess Fanficiton was having problems with the log in thingy. But here it is now. :) **

**Thank you all for reading, reviewing, and sticking with the story. I'm glad all of you like. Enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**--x--**

Two hours. One hundred and twenty minuets. And my fingers are in agony. I raise my left hand and look at the blisters at the tip of my fingers and know someday that they will become calluses. I never realized how hard it was to get back into the swing of things.

I fixed my guitar, but that took forever and it is not completely tuned, and my fingers have totally lost their way. They are not strong or flexible as I need them to be. My chord changes are slower than ever. This will definitely take a lot of work. Sigh, but Lilly is worth it.

--x--

Monday. School. The endless cycle of my life continues. I'm already in the cafeteria doing my work. I came early don't ask me why I just did. I could not sleep at all last night, so I tried writing, worth a shot right? I wrote for hours, but got no songs, well nothing for Lilly. I think I'm depressed. Everything I wrote was death, loneliness, heartbreak, hatred. Nothing that I could give to Lilly, or even dream of giving to Lilly. Nothing comes easily does it?

"There she is…" I hear Oliver's voice and turn my head; Lilly and Oliver are walking over to me, smiles on their faces. What is wrong with them, it's Monday. Oliver meets up with me first and we do our little handshake, and Lilly shies away into a seat. Hmmm maybe we should teach her our handshake, or invent one just me and her. "'Sup Miles."

"Not much Oliver." Ever since I left Lilly and found my guitar my Father has not come home, this might concern others but I could not be happier. It's just me. Living on my own. It's nice. I don't have to worry about anyone else. I could take care of myself, besides in two years I'm gone. I look over at Lilly and see her bright shining face and my day just got better. "Hey Lil."

Lilly smiles and rests her arms on the table. "Hey Miles." I couldn't help but smile back and stare at her until Oliver nudges my shoulder.

"Hey guys what do you say after today we all hang out, like the beach, mall," Oliver leans in and whispers in my ear. "Behind the mall." I smirk. He wants a cig. Lilly looks at us curiously. My smirk fades and I think the best bet is the beach, or Rico's, at least. I don't want Lilly exposed to those cancer sticks.

I turn to Oliver and reply. "You do what you want Oliver, but I think heading to Rico's for a snack would be fine with me. Lilly?"

Oliver and I look at her. "Ummm…" How could she struggle to choose? She doesn't even know Oliver's other suggestion. "I think Rico's would be better."

"Ha!" I look at Oliver happy over my win and his loss, as he sulks back, with a pout.

"Hey," I turn to Lilly and see amusement on her face. "Just because I said Rico's was better doesn't mean I want to go."

My face drops from my win and Oliver perks up and laughs loudly in my ear. "HA!" I flinch away and hit him in the chest.

"She didn't choose yet ya doughnut." I look at Lilly and her eyes are glowing. I swallow hard and look away, knowing my accent gets thicker whenever I'm worked up and she definitely heard it.

She lets a small laugh escape her lips. "Cute accent Miles." I whip my head back at her and she is smiling, I nod gently as a form of thanks.

"Hey, could we just choose a place to go please?" I look at Oliver and glare at him. I was having a moment! She thinks my accent is cute! Whoa, reality check, chill Miles you are not a fan girl, it's not like me to get all excited when someone comments my accent, considering everyone around here does not like my accent.

"Okay, sorry Oliver," Lilly shifts in her seat as she comes to a decision. "But I would prefer to go to Rico's."

"HA HA!" I triumphed. Oliver sticks his tongue out at me as Lilly and I laugh. Yeah we're weird and fight over stupid things, but that's just us having fun. I look at Lilly, as she places a strand of hair behind her ear, during her laughter and cannot help but think she will fit in perfectly with Oliver and me.

--x--

It's been two weeks. Two short, awesome weeks. My Father still has not returned, now I'm slightly concerned, but no one knows, so I think I could be in the clear for awhile. Its not like anything bad happened to him, he took the car, so I'm assuming he is safe, but I hope he is happy.

Lilly, Oliver, and I have gotten much closer. I was right when saying she would fit right in with us. There really is not a lot she doesn't know about us. Well me anyway. She knows a lot about Oliver, she picks on him them same way I do, they fight constantly like brother and sister, everything is a competition, plus she is trying to get him to stop smoking, which I think will take her a lifetime but that's her challenge.

She and I have gotten closer, or as close as I will let her that is. I did and still do have to tell some white lies to her, but hopefully those will all pan out. Her parents keep a watchful eye on me though. They know that I get in trouble sometimes and I think they feel I'm not a good impression on her, but she is having the impression on me. I'm doing better in school and my spirit has been lifted. That is a major improvement.

We are in her room now doing homework. This has become routine to us after school, to get homework done and play later. She is at her desk and I am on her floor, but I'm not doing my work. I usually take this time just to stare at Lilly. I admire her and her beauty. She gets so concentrated on her work; you would never imagine she was this fun, crazy, active person. It's kind of funny, but extremely cute.

There's one bad thing though. When I'm around Lilly. She has me so whipped. I would basically do anything for her. I'm completely vulnerable and not only do I hate that but it scares me. I'm afraid of one day to slip, just let my guard down, and then she will know everything. My past, my now, my everything and it is not all good stuff. I don't want her to know, but I'm afraid that someday she will know.

Lilly does a quick glance at me, and then looks again her full attention on me. She looks around with her eyes before smiling. "What?"

I shrug and shake my head. "Nothing."

She turns and faces her homework, but with a sigh, a disappointed sigh. Great, now what? "It's not just nothing Miles." True to me it's not nothing, but if I told her it would be something. She gets up from her desk and makes her way over to me, sitting down pretty close. Her legs are curled to her side and her arm is resting on the bed, over my head. "It's been 'nothing' for the past three days, what's up? And don't lie."

I let a fake laugh escape my lips and turn away from her. "It's nothing Lilly; can't a person just be in deep thought?" I don't want to get annoyed because I'm very appreciative that Lilly cares for me and cares to ask but I don't want her knowing.

"Well yeah a person can, but for three days Miles? I know something is bothering you Miles." I look down at my notebook, I want to drop it. "Come on Miles you can tell me, you're my best friend." I slowly look up at her and when I do a reassuring smile spreads across her face. Best Friend?

"Really?" Did I do it? In these past weeks did Lilly and I become friends and surpass that to become best friends? Best Friends? Lilly and I are best friends?

She nods and speaks without hesitation. "Yeah." My heart soars, though I do not show it on my face. I did do it. Lilly considers us best friends, now for the next and hard step. She shifts on the floor and moves her arm to grab my hand and rubs her thumb over it. "So can you tell me? I mean-"

"ItsnothingLilly." I cut her off and speak a thousand miles an hour. I would have been fine, but with the excitement from hearing we are best friends to her grabbing my hand and rubbing it sent me over the top, my heart started racing and I had no control.

"O-okay." Hurt and disappointment falls on her face and she lets go of my hand. The warmth and electric shocks I was feeling are now gone. She gets up and starts to head back over to her desk.

"I-uh," I feel bad, I want to do something to make her happy. She turns her head around and I think of something quickly to tell her. "I umm I'm working on that song for you." She turns herself around all the way and smiles.

"Really." I nod and she comes back over to sit next to me. "You didn't have to do that Miles." I shrug. "Well how's it coming? Can I hear some of it?"

I change my position to Indian style and move my notebook away from me. "It's coming, but no, not yet anyway. I want it completed; I want it to be perfect. So until it is you probably won't hear it."

Her smile grows and interest fills her eyes. "It doesn't have to be perfect Miles."

"I want it to be Lilly. You're my best friend right? I want it to be special for you, well…because-because you're special to me." I shrug down and my cheeks flush. Here is my vulnerability thing Lilly has over me. I suddenly feel to arms wrap around my neck and my body is soon pressed up against hers.

"That's one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for me, thank you Miles. And you are right best friends are special. I'm sure it will be perfect once you finish it." I smile and wrap my arms around her waist pulling her closer to me, loving the body contact and the warmth. I shift my head into her hair and breathe her in. Vanilla and strawberries.

"You're welcome Lilly."

**--x--**

**So? Is Miley losing her tough girl image? Maybe? Where the heck is Miley's Father? I have no clue. When will Miley and Lilly get together? I don't have the answer to that either. But soon. See you next time guys', :) Till then. **


	13. Chapter 12

**Hey Everyone. :) Yeah this is late again, but as my bad luck goes, the computer got a virus. Sorry. But I'm back, and this chapter is slightly longer, I think, so I hope that makes up for it.**

**Thank You all for reading and reviewing. I hope you are still enjoying the story as much as I enjoy writing it. **

**And how about that episode What I Dont Like About You. :'(. I might say some spoilers right now for those who did not see it. Come Disney throw us a bone. All though I thought I saw subtle hints of Liley in that episode. Still sad though. In my opinion it was kind of awkward seeing Lilly and Oliver together. Oh well as long as Miley and Lilly still have their Miley Lilly time.  
**

**--x--**

Another two weeks. More practices on the guitar. More hanging out. No song. Sigh. Its night, Saturday, late. Really late. Vanilla and strawberries. I still have the smell of Lilly burned in my mind. Vanilla and strawberries.

I'm lying on bed, in the dark, looking up at the ceiling. My mind racing. Should I risk my new friendship with Lilly for the more intense emotions I'm feeling for her? We are now best friends right? Is love worth risking? Heck I don't even know if she is into girls, or even okay with homosexuality. Best Friends. That is what we are, that is how close we have become, yet so far from where I want to be.

I guess I could drop hints or something. Test her. See if she is at least okay with homosexuals. Or maybe I'm better off just asking her straight out. Ugh. But what do I say then? "Hey Lil what do you feel about gays'?" No, I don't think that will work. It seems a little mean. Plus how do you even start a conversation about this? Its really not one of the many topics you talk about with friends. So how do you pop it up in a conversation? How does anyone do it? It's not like I could just walk right up to her and bring it up like shoes or something. That's not how it works does it? Sigh. Unless I start with politics, then lead to her opinions of liberals and conservatives, then lead to the liberals and conservatives' opinions, then that will hopefully lead to gays! But wait, starting with a conversation about politics sort of puts me in the same situation on how to pop the conversation about gays.

I roll over on my bed to my side and check the time. For get it. I'll just sleep on it. I'm sure I'll find away to get this entire thing out in the open.

--x--

"Miley!" My eyes whip open only to be greeted by the sun. Did someone just call me? I sit up, my heart starts racing. It's hard to hear as blood is rushing through my ears. Is my Father back from his like month absence? I hear movement downstairs. I could have sworn I locked the door. I swallow hard and get out of bed. I open my door slowly and listen. Yep, someone's down there, but who?

I carefully slip out of my room and into the hallway and do my best to stay quiet. I carefully walk down the stairs and turn to look in the kitchen. But wait. If someone was in the house they wouldn't want to be seen. I quickly turn around and look at the piano and the porch outside. I back up slowly until my back collides with something. "Ahhh!" I turn around as soon as I heard the other person scream and turn to look at me. "Oliver!" I put my hand to my heart and stop it from racing. "What the hell?! How did you get in here, the door was locked!"

Oliver looks like a deer caught in the headlights and a deer that has seen a ghost. He is panting, obviously from the fright. "From that trick you showed me last summer on how to pick the lock. Y'know kinda like how you unlock a car door using a hanger."

I have to think for second before remembering telling Oliver that. I remember. I learned how to pick locks on doors, windows, and cars. From me running away and looking for a place to stay, only to end up back here. "Okay, but what are you doing here?"

I walk into the kitchen to get a drink. "I came to check up on you." I roll my eyes; I'm perfectly fine and can take care of myself. Why does everyone always want to help? I look in the fridge and we, or I on the other hand, are low on milk and juice, and lots of other things. But what do you expect, I have no money. "Lilly and I have been worried about you."

I close the fridge door, get a glass, and get a drink of water from the sink. "Why? I'm fine Oliver. Lilly and you don't need to worry." Although I'm slightly starting to worry. How much longer could I survive if I have no money? I don't have a job. And I've pretty much wiped out all the money I found in my Father's room.

"What do you mean why Miles. This is the first time I have been over your house in four weeks, a month. And besides that Lilly has never been here. I think and we feel like you are hiding something from us. What is it, is it anything, drugs, what?"

I take a sip of my water and stare at Oliver with the most stone normal look I can do. "Nothing." Oliver rolls his eyes and sighs. "Don't start Oliver." I put my glass down and brush past Oliver making my way back up to my room. First Lilly and now Oliver, who's next? Please take a number and get in line. Other people may be an open book, but I'm not one to read. I hear Oliver hot on my heels, I pick up my pace and try to slam the door, but Oliver blocks it, with his hand. He lets out a yelp as he holds his hand. "Ya doughnut, you block a door with your foot not your hand."

"Well excuse me for not knowing that!" He rubs his hand and steps inside. I turn my back towards him as I fold my arms over my chest. "Okay, Miles, I-I don't want to fight. Sorry."

I turn around and let out a sigh as my arms fall back to my side. I didn't mean to snap at Oliver, but I rather he be mad at me than Lilly. Only because I have known Oliver longer, and no matter what I know he will always come back to me. Lilly, well I don't know. I guess I'm scared. Scared of how I like her so much, scared that I have these feelings, scared that she may not feel the same way, scared that she might actually feel the same way. "I'm sorry too. I didn't mean to snap Oliver. It's just, things with Lilly, my life, my Father…"

"Hey," He walks over to me and puts a reassuring hand on my shoulder. "Its going to be okay, Lilly will be yours, your life will get better, and your Dad…wait what happened?" Oliver looks at me but I downcast my eyes to the floor. Oliver looks around, probably listening for my Father. "Your Dad? Where is he? Did something else happen. You could tell me Miles."

I sigh. "No Oliver, he uh went out last night with another bimbo, its no biggie. Don't worry about it. I just wish he would stop. I wish he would stop living his fantasy life and wake up and take on his adult role, y'know."

"Yeah I know, plus none of those skanks will ever be as pretty or hot as your Mom. Ow." I slap Oliver in the chest and he backs away. "What? That was a compliment."

"I don't care. Don't talk about my Mom." I have a picture of my Mom near my bed on the nightstand. One time Oliver to one look at it and he started drooling all over her, it bothers me. "So is there any other reason you came over? If not then go."

Oliver nods his head happily. "Yep, actually there is this party-"

"Stop! No way Oliver I'm all partied out, but thanks for the offer."

Oliver nods in understanding. "Yeah sure, no problem, I bet I could find somebody else to go with. See ya around Miles, and hey, smile a bit more, y'know kinda like how you do when Lilly is around."

My eyebrows grow narrow and I grab a pillow from my bed and throw it at him. "Get out." He catches the pillow and throws it back. "You don't care; you probably just want to record us making out, if that ever happens."

Oliver shrugs. "Hey what can I say I am a guy y'know?" I smile, he smiles, and then he is gone.

--x--

I'm at Rico's now. Just sitting by myself. But I don't mind. The breeze from the ocean brushes past my skin and it feels good. Just thinking. Clearing my mind. I'm here and Oliver is at some party, with someone. Who could have Oliver brought with him anyway? For some odd reason Lilly pops into my mind. No, no way, he wouldn't, she wouldn't, would they?

--x--

He would. I'm at the party. A big party. One of those parties where there parents are out of town so the kid throws this huge party, with the works, drugs, alcohol, everything. He would and did. He brought Lilly and she looks beyond drunk. Anger and sadness rage inside me. Anger towards Oliver bringing Lilly here and sadness that Lilly came and got drunk.

She is unbalanced as she dances, or grinds up the guy that is grinding behind her. I'm jealous. I take a breath out I didn't even realize I was holding. I'm sure Oliver told her the rules that they never leave with out one another, but I'm getting Lilly out of here, now.

"Hey Baby didn't I see you some place before." Some drunken bastard comes up beside me and starts grinding on me.

"Yes you have that is why I don't go there anymore," I take his arm and turn him around, pulling hard, twisting his arm. "Now get away from me." I push him and he falls to the floor, but before he can get up I kick him, and he groans.

I turn my attention back to Lilly. I can see her better. Sweat is glisten on her body and she is lost in the intoxicating alcohol. The guy behind her has his hands all over her gliding against her body, groping at her thighs and anything else he can get his hands on. My throat constricts and I feel my eyes burn. I'm upset. I'm upset enough to cry? Lilly what have you done to me. I bite my lip and make my way over to them.

"Lilly?" She does not hear, or notice me. So I step closer and say her name louder. "Lilly." Nothing. I gently reach my hand out and touch her arm. "Lilly!" That gets her attention.

She turns and looks at me, her eyes glazed. Oh Lilly. "Milly, Hey." Milly? Okay, I'll let that slide. "What doing here?"

"Taking you home. Come on." I let my hand wrap around her arm and start to pull her away. Away from the guy and away from here. When I'm stopped.

"Hey maybe she doesn't want to go." I turn around and see the guy that she was dancing with. I look at him. He is not as drunk as Lilly. He still has somewhat of a conscious left inside of him. I get angry. He was easily trying to taking advantage of Lilly.

"Yeah," My focus moves to Lilly. She agrees. "Come on Mills, have some fun." It's hard to understand her slurred speech, but I don't care.

"No Lilly, we are going home." I grip her arm tighter. But the man whore she was with pulls her back. I'm not in the mood to deal with this so I kick my leg forward and hit him perfectly in between the legs, and he goes down. "Come on Lilly."

Lilly stares at him rolling on the floor until I pull her away. "No." Its firm yet whinny. What? "Come on, let's have some fun."

"You've had enough fun Lil." Before I could do anything else Lilly snakes one of her arms around my neck and pushes me towards her body. The look in her eyes feels like daggers and now I'm sacred. My heart and breath quicken pace at the closeness of Lilly and the body contact. "Lilly." My voice is now weak and quiet, I'm losing.

Lilly takes her other hand and places it at my side before she starts to grind against me. Our bodies rubbing off of each other sets mine on fire. I close my eyes tight and try to catch my breath. I can't control my self as my hands start to roam over her body and I slowly start to move against Lilly. Lilly then turns around in my arms so her back is against my front and she slides up and down my body as my hands still travel on hers. I just knocked some guy out for almost taking advantage of Lilly now I'm doing the same. It's not my fault right now Lilly is intoxicating.

My mouth goes dry and I lick my lips. Even though my body is feeling ecstasy right now I have to stop. I need control. My bodies on fire, my heart is in panic mode, and my mind is racing. All things I want to do to Lilly, I can do it, right now. She won't remember. Everything I ever wanted I could do, but I can't. "Lil-Lilly. S-stop." She doesn't listen. I clear my voice and try again, louder this time. "Stop!" She does. I take her hand and bring her outside, into the cool air.

"What?" Lilly's voice is hard and bitchy.

I'm shaken. My breath comes out shaky. I keep my back towards Lilly. I can't face her. I was just about to take her right then and there. But thank God I stopped. I move my hand through my hair. Before turning to look back at her. "What was that Lilly?"

"Oh come on, I'm just having some fun. Ollie says you do it all the time." Ollie? Her speech is better, wow that was quick, but I could tell she is still out of it.

"What does what I do, have to do with what you were doing in there." I point inside and she looks.

She then rolls her eyes and walks towards me. "Mi, I was just having fun. Like you always do."

"There's a difference _Li_. You and I are different. You can't compare me to you. You…you are not like that. At least the Lilly I know. You can't even see yourself right now or before but that was, that was…" I shake my head. "It doesn't matter."

Lilly scoffs. "What just cause you are the "bad" "hurt" girl means you are the only one who could goof off. Just because the whole world turned on you, you turn on the world. We are not that much different." She takes another step towards me.

I want to take a step back but I don't move. Lilly's word stung a little but I can't take them to heart. She's drunk she doesn't realize what she is saying; all though some say alcohol is like a truth serum I don't believe it. "Yes we are." She comes closer I can smell her breath and it reeks of alcohol. I shake my head as I look into her eyes. "You know what we are Lilly, you and I we are like like fire and ice, do you know what fire and ice make?"

Lilly smiles, a devious smile, and if we weren't in the position we are in right now I would call it hot. "Yeah, steam." I knit my eyebrows together. Before I have time to react, Lilly grabs my shirt and pulls me close as out lips meet.

I can't control my emotions and desires. So I react. I cup her cheek and press our lips harder together. It's not what I was expecting, she's drunk, a kiss should not be perfect, yet it is. My other hand rests on her waist and I hold her close as our lips speak there own language. Her hands loosen grip on my shirt and travel to wrap around my neck.

I'm passed cloud nine and crash landed on cloud ten. My mouth opens slightly and Lilly dives her tongue in. But mine retreats. I can feel Lilly's tongue search for mine but I won't allow it. I can't do this. I let our lips linger for one more second, before pulling away, and pushing Lilly away from me. We are both breathing heavy and my hands slip from her waist as hers does from my neck. In a split second I think Lilly just suddenly turns sober, but she is a statue. I run. Why am I running when she kissed me I don't know, I need to think.

I close my eyes and feel, tears slowly fall. It happened, but it wasn't real. It wasn't real. I'm at the beach and I fall to my knees. It wasn't real. She didn't mean it, she didn't feel it, she was drunk, I took advantage of her for my own wants. It wasn't real. My hand reaches up to my lips. It wasn't real.

Vanilla, strawberries, and alcohol. It wasn't real.

**--x--**

**:0 Oh come on Miley stop running. Okay so, will Lilly and Miley resolve this problem? Will they end up together? Where is Miley's Dad? And Will Miley kill Oliver for taking Lilly to that party? Or thank him? I'll see you all next chapter, Till Then :).  
**


	14. Chapter 13

**Hello Fanficiton and all who surf it. :), Hey guys' well once again I would like to happily thank all of you for reading and reviewing, the story is getting better, well in my mind anyway, and I hope you all like it. Although this chapter really isn't IT yet, I hope you like it. **

**Thank You Once Again. :)  
**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**--x--**

The sun is shining, the birds are singing, the air is crisp and clear, and I'm miserable. I kissed Lilly and although it should have been pure bliss, it sort of wasn't considering she was not really all that there. She didn't know her actions or the effect her actions will soon have towards me. I also shouldn't have ran, I ran away and left Lilly all there all by herself alone, drunk. Oh my God.

My heart races and I want my feet to run but they are not responding. I left Lilly, alone and drunk, outside. Holy crap. I run, yet again, but this times towards Lilly's house. I reach Lilly's house and pray to God that she is inside and alright. I don't even think nor have manners, as my mind focuses on Lilly. I run up to the Truscott's front door, turn the handle and bust in. Apparently I did that very loudly because Mr. Truscott stopped midway in drinking his coffee, mouth open and all, and just stares at me, while Mrs. Truscott is frozen holding a frying pan in her hand, and what looks like an omelet inside. Now I freeze. "Oh sorry." My hand still on the handle I back up and close the door. Wow, that was epic. I couldn't help but let out a laugh. If only you saw there faces. Once I gain composure I knock on the door. The door opens and I'm greeted by Mrs. Truscott.

"Why hello Miley, what an unexpected surprise. Please come in." She opens the door all the way for me, and I could tell she was holding in a laugh. I greet her and thank her as I step inside.

"Hello Mr. Truscott, nice day huh?" Mr. Truscott lifts his coffee mug towards me and smiles. Why can't I have parents like this? "So umm…is Lilly upstairs?"

I feel a hand on my shoulder and I turn my head around to see Mrs. Truscott smiling at me. "Go right on up dear." I thank them and turn to head upstairs. "Oh and Miley," I turn on the stairs and look at Mrs. Truscott. "I don't think she is feeling to well, could you bring this up to her?"

Her mother hands me some tea and toast. I nod my head as I accept the tray and head upstairs. Poor Lilly she must have a killer hangover. As I make my way to her room, the room that became my room, I'm a nervous wreck. Apart of me wants Lilly to remember last night; another part of me does not. I could tell her how I feel, get it over with and live happily ever after, or I could continue to suffer why I pretend I don't have these feelings for her.

I balance the tray in my hand as I slowly turn the doorknob and enter Lilly's room. "Lilly?" I try to keep my voice quiet incase she does have a headache. The room is dark and I look all around for her. Until I notice a lump in her bed. "Lilly?" I put the tray down on her desk and walk over to her bed.

She is sprawled out everywhere; parts of the covers are barely covering her body, her left arm hangs over the bed. "Lilly?" She moans slightly and turns over on her bed, so she is lying on her back. I sit down on the bed and look at her. Her hair is spilled everywhere on her pillow and she looks slightly pale. I am definitely killing Oliver. I reach my hand forward and brush her hair out of her face. "I'm sorry." Lilly moves herself as she moans and puts slight pressure on my hand as it cups her cheek. "Lilly?"

Lilly squirms and I pull my hand away from her as if she was lava. She carefully opens her eyes and quickly shuts them. She brings her hands up to her eyes and rubs them. She groans again as she turns. She lifts herself up and I do my best to help her. She opens her eyes and holds her head in her hands. "M-Miley?"

"Hold on." Her voice was hoarse and I could image her mouth is drier than the Sarah Desert. I go to the bathroom and get her a glass of water. "Here." I hand it to her and she takes it with a shaky hand.

She drinks it down like it's her life and wipes her mouth. "Thanks." She hands the cup back to me and I put it next her tea and toast.

"How are you feeling?" She groans again. I wish I could just take the pain away.

"Like I had been hit by a truck…repeatedly" I move over and sit on the bed next to her. "Miley promise me something?"

I shrug my shoulders. "Sure anything Lil."

A small smile reaches her lips and it matches the smile in her eyes. "Never let me drink again." I laugh lightly and she joins in, but stops with a groan. Her head must kill. One thing I love about Lilly, her sense of humor. She leans her head back and closes her eyes. "Make the pain stop Miles."

Gosh, I cannot believe how desperate, hurt, and lonely she sounds, she is usually pretty strong. "I'm sorry, but there is nothing you can take Lil." She winces and I reach over and grab her hand, she accepts, and I rub my thumb across her hand. "I'd do anything to take the pain way Lilly."

She opens her eyes and a new smile is on her face. She squeezes my hand tighter. She moves her free hand and traces my cheek. Oh God. She still can't be somewhat drunk right? Does she even remember last night? My mouth goes dry, my heart speeds, up and eventually Lilly will be the death of me. "I know Miles, me too." She looks into my eyes and I look away.

I feel my hand start to sweat and I pull it away and stand up, letting Lilly's hand glide across my cheek. "Umm…yeah, well, I…uh" I clear my throat and turn around not facing Lilly; I feel my face grow hot. "Umm Lilly?" I fidget with my hands before tapping them lightly against each other, I have to ask. "D-do you remember anything from last night?" I turn around and look at Lilly.

She frowns, slightly, and I do to. "I'm sorry Miles, I-I don't." I put my head down, just great. "I didn't do anything embarrassing or stupid did I?" Panic strikes Lilly and she sits forward.

I smile reassuringly. "No Lilly, you did not." I put my hands inside my pockets and silence falls between us. "Look, you need your rest; umm I think I'm going to catch up with Oliver." Or kill him. I turn to leave, but stop once I hear Lilly's voice.

"Miley?" I look at her. "Thank you." She smiles.

I swallow. "You're welcome Lilly." I leave quietly and head downstairs saying goodbye to Mr. and Mrs. Truscott. Back to friends.

--x--

I'm on my way to Oliver's and boy is he in for it. Before I got here I swung by my house to shower and change, and I realized something. I changed. I changed a lot. I dress slightly differently, although they are still my same clothes, they are neater. My hair, I'm in shock, the blue is fading and I'm letting my natural hair color show, I also don't put my bangs so much in my eyes anymore, although since they sometimes go back to covering them, because that is how they are cut. I never realized it until I looked in the mirror. I've changed. I think my whole attitude and personality as well. Usually I would bitch at people if they ever did something to me, now I pretty much just let it roll off my shoulders. I'm happier more too. It's weird.

I have no more time to think about it as I walk inside Oliver's house. "OLIVER!!!!" Time to let the tiger Miley out. I don't worry about Oliver's parents I know they are both at work. "OLIVER GET YOU BUTT DOWN HERE!" I hear a thud from upstairs and I have no patience to wait, I run up the stairs and head towards Oliver's room. I swing Oliver's half closed door open and I see Oliver on the floor tangled in his sheets. Oliver looks at me and I look at him and fear comes up in his eyes. "You're dead." Oliver tries to scramble to his feet but I pounce on him making him yell like a little girl.

--x--

"Okay uncle, mercy, I'm sorry, I didn't know." Oliver pleas with me as I have him face down on the floor his arm twisted behind him and me sitting on his back. "I'm sorry, let go of my arm before you break it."

"You better be fucking sorry." I pull his arm slightly tighter and he yelps in pain. Does Oliver deserve this much hurt? Probably not, but I am getting a good laugh out of it. I let go of Oliver's arm and get off of him. I beat him up pretty good. His lip is swollen and he has a cut near his eye, I even kicked him in the stomach a few times. He sits up and holds his arm in pain. I sit down on the floor across from him. "Sorry Oliver, but how could you be so stupid? I mean really come on."

He holds his arms and looks at me. "I'm sorry Miley, honestly, she said she could control herself, and I believed her, I'm sorry Miles, but you seem more upset then usual, why?"

"Because Oliver," Maybe I beat him up more than necessary but that was because I'm frustrated. Lilly kissed me and she does not even remember it. How can I not be mad? "Because…" My voice grows weaker and I'm sure Oliver cannot hear me right now. "Because she kissed me."

I don't look at Oliver as I find new interest in his floor. "Oh, Miles, I'm…" Oliver does not say anything else; he scoots over closer to me and makes me rest my head on his shoulder. Thank God for Oliver.

--x--

I spent a couple of hours at Oliver's we watched a few movies, ate some pizza, and just chilled. Now I'm home and it feels all to empty. I'm running out of money, I'm running out of food, I'm running out of clothes, since I can't buy any detergent to wash them.

I head up to my room and take another look at myself in the mirror. Total transformation. I cannot believe it. I did a complete one-eighty. I'm losing my image, my all around, tough girl attitude, my I don't care, my piss off, my everything. I'm happier and sweeter, I dress differently, I smile more, I'm not who I thought I was.

Who am I?

If this is me now, who was I before? Is this me or was that me? And what about when I was younger? I don't have an all that great memory but I know I was not a juvenile delinquent when I was a kid. So I guess this is me and that was not me. I close my eyes and shake my head, now I'm confused. I inch closer to the mirror and put my hand on top of my reflections hand. I slightly bite my lower lip as I see tears well up in my eyes. I let my hand fall slightly on the mirror before I lean my head forward and cry. I shift all my body on the mirror before I slide down. I pull my knees close to my chest and let my elbow rest on my knees, as I hold my head in my hands.

Stop it Miles, you are tougher than this; you are strong, like a rock, no time to break down. I push my hair back and turn around to look at myself one last time. I changed…and I don't like it.

**--x--**

**I have a funny feeling Miley might do something totally drastic, what do you think? And it's about time I called DCF for Miley's Dad. Okay this is slightly a dry chapter to me, but I hope you guys' liked it. So what will Miley do? Is Lilly telling the whole truth? Find out next chapter. Till then :). **


	15. Chapter 14

**Hey guys' I would like to thank you all for reading and reviewing, and _Music and Reading Lover_, :), lol, I cannot believe that word slipped by me I feel like slapping myself in the forehead, yeah I meant Sahara Desert :).  
**

**This chapter is pretty short, but it is needed, and the next chapter should be longer .  
**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**--x--**

The start of a new day and the start of the new slash old me. I re-dyed my hair but it's a darker blue than before. I made sure my hair falls to cover my eye and I'm back to wearing what I used to wear, I don't care. I leave the house without breakfast and make my way to school. I don't wait up for Oliver and I could careless. This was me and this is going to be me.

I make my way up the stairs to the school and take out my pen and drag them against the lockers cause an annoying taping noise. People look and stare, but don't say anything. Good, they should fear me, they should respect me. I want them to and now I am in control. I go to my locker open it throw my shit in and take some out. I slam it and I do not walk to the cafeteria, why? Because Lilly will be there and I cannot face her. Instead I head to the court yard, where actually only seniors are allowed but I'm daring. I bust open the doors and a few seniors turn their heads and stare at me. I give them death glares. They don't say a word, a smirk appears on my face as I go to sit down, and write down random answers to the math homework I did not do.

--x--

The bell rings and I make my way out of the courtyard and head to math class. I wanna try and get there early so Oliver does not question me. Besides he does not need to know. I make my way into the hall and the freshman have gotten better at getting out of the way but just not quick enough. I ram my way through them and shove some of them to the nearest wall or wall of lockers. Some of them drop their books and I let a smirk come across my face. They'll learn sooner or later.

I get into math class, before Oliver, and head to my usual seat. Although I could not help but notice the stares I was getting from the few people in the room. I give them the finger. "Fuck off." They all make faces and turn away. "Bastards" I mutter under my breath, hoping it was loud enough for them to hear me. I guess it wasn't.

I put my head down on my desk and close my eyes. Maybe I could get a few more minuets of sleep before the teacher comes. "Hey Miles," Oliver, I pick my head up and look at him. "What is…up?" Oliver notices my appearance and sits down in his seat cautiously. I lean back in my seat and shrug. Oliver was about to say something but the teacher interrupted. Never thought I would be grateful for a teacher.

--x--

The math class was beyond awkward especially with Oliver looking back at me every five stinkin' minuets. I ran out of there fast with Oliver calling my name. I guess he noticed my change and my second change. I guess he saw my transformation into a good girl, well I'm not one, I'm not a push over like Oliver. He changed. He does a lot more sports now and he hardly ever invites me to the back of the mall anymore. Him and Lilly have gotten a heck of a lot closer. Maybe I'm slightly jealous. Oliver was mine first, but I really don't have all that much in common with him like Lilly does. And Lilly she is practically an angel I don't see how she fits in with Oliver and I at all.

I'm in the cafeteria sitting alone…for now. I don't bother getting any food; I'm low on money I have to save up. It's depressing really. I already lost a few pounds, but it's not enough for anyone to notice. I quickly look up from my seat and see Lilly and Oliver approaching. Perfect. Oliver walks a little faster stepping ahead of Lilly and opens his mouth to talk. "Hey Miles."

I say nothing and look down. "'Sup Miley." I look at Lilly and she is all smiles, hardly fazed, that's Lilly for her. She must be feeling so much better, well at least I think she is.

"Hey." Is all I say before I put my head back down. Oliver clears his throat and Lilly taps her hand on the table. We sit in awkward silence for a few minuets yet is seems like hours before Lilly decides that she is going to get lunch.

I wrap my arms around myself, they planned that. "Miles?" Yep, here comes a good Hallmark moment, but I won't let it be one. "Miley, a-are you okay, come on you know you could talk to me."

Oliver rests his hand on my shoulder and I shrug it off. Oliver lets out a defeated sigh. I bite my lip, a habit I should really break, and look up. Oliver looks back at me at my movement and gives me a soft smile. "Ditch with me?" Oliver's eyebrows knit together as he contemplates leaving school. He looks over at Lilly and then back at me, and nods.

--x--

Oliver and I leave the school quite easily. We each headed to the bathroom and slipped out the windows. Now we are behind the mall. Just me and Oliver. I rest my back against the wall and he stands in front of me, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a pack of cigarettes. Just like old times. "Give me one." I did even ask and Oliver didn't even have time to react, I reached for one.

"What," Oliver moves the box way. "Miles you don't smoke, besides I'm trying to quit."

"That's great Oliver, I don't care, give me one." I reach for the pack again and again Oliver retreats. "Fucking give me one Oliver!" Oliver looks scared. He sticks the pack out and I take one. I put the cigarette near my mouth. "Light me." Oliver opens his mouth to protest but I give him a stern look. He complies and lights the cigarette for me. And I breathe it in. Normally a beginner would start wheezing, choking, and coughing, but I don't. I have watched Oliver for a long time. He even spoke to me on how to use one when he got his first pack, so I'm good.

"Miley? Seriously, you're freaking me out," I puff on my cigarette and roll my eyes. "Even Lilly, what happened Miles, what's wrong?"

The cigarette is nasty. I didn't think they taste this bad, even though I'm fond of the smell. I blow the smoke out, right in Oliver's face and lean back against the wall. "Nothing."

I look up at Oliver and his face has grown angry. What in the world can he be mad about. He has a cushion life. Two great parents, great friends, and he has the ability to have a girlfriend, he just doesn't go for it. "No it's not nothing!" Whoa, Oliver rarely raises his voice. He comes forward at me and takes the cigarette out of my hands and throws it on the ground, then stomping on.

"What the hell?" I lean forward and push him. "Whad ya do that for?" I silently curse myself as my accent gets thicker and Oliver should know that he is getting me mad.

"For you own good. What is up Miles? I'm not taking nothing for an answer. In less than twenty-four hours you changed. Why?" Oliver points his finger into my chest and slightly hovers over me, looking directly into my eyes. So he noticed my change, but I just changed back into what I was. So does that mean Oliver does not like me this way, the real me? "This is not you Miles, so answer me!" Oliver grips my shoulders, tightly, and holds me up against the wall.

I move my arms up in between us and push him with all my might. He stumbles backward. "Leave me alone Oliver!" Poison is in my voice but tears are in my heart, Oliver looks at me with worry and comes closer to me, I turn and run. Although I'm sick and tired of running, I run. Before I completely left Oliver I see him whip out his cell phone. I don't care who he is calling they will never help me.

--x--

I do the best to get the tears out of my eyes and finally stop running. I walk on the sidewalk and head for home. "Stupid Oliver." I make my way to the front door and open it closing it with a bang. "Too good for his own dang good." There is a crash in the kitchen and I lift my head to look at whoever is here. My heart stops as I stop dead in my tracks. The person turns around slowly and matches the same expression on my face, wide eyes and open mouth. I take a few steps forward and they take a couple to the side. My mouth opens and closes as it tries to form words, that one word, that one word that I have not said in awhile, that one word that was my first word. "D-Dad?"

**--x--**

**Robbie Ray :O OMG!!!! Well Miley turned into a little nasty didn't she? And what is Robbie Ray doing back home? What will happen next, tune in next chapter. Till then :). **


	16. Chapter 15

**Okay well, here we are, the next chapter. It should be longer. Any who, thank you all for reading and reviewing, I have nothing else to say so Enjoy. :). **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**--x--**

I stare in shock and so does he. He frantically looks around everywhere before he takes off. "Dad! Wait!" I run after him, he flies out the back door and heads for his car, why didn't I see it before? He hops in. "Dad please! Don't go!" I catch up to his car and put one hand on the vehicle before I hear him step on the gas and take off. I fall down to the pavement, leaving scratches on my hands. I quickly get up and leave the driveway and head to the street. "DAD!!" The car drives away and I fall to me knees. "Don't go." I'm in the middle of the street, which is extremely dangerous, and I cry. I know I say a lot of things about my Dad, and I even stopped calling him Dad and went with Father, but deep down inside, I love him.

There I said it, I love my Dad. I know I want to divorce him and he pretty much abandoned me but I love him. He was the only family member I have here, everyone else is in Tennessee. I cannot believe him. I close my stinging eyes and look up to where he took off. Fine if he doesn't want a daughter then he does not need one. I stop crying, I can't cry, crying is for the weak. I'm not weak. But I am hurt.

I stand up and straighten my clothing. I don't see anything but red. I make my way back inside my house and head up to my room. I slam my bedroom door and make my way to the bathroom and slam that door behind me as well. I go into the shower and put the water on hot as hot as it can go. I cannot take it anymore, my candle is no longer burning, it's out. I don't want this anymore, I don't want the hurt, I don't want the pain, I don't want anything, I don't need anything, or anyone, I cannot not take the pain.

The shower sputters on and the water is hot. It hurts, but it feels good. My clothes get drenched and my skin turns red in pain. Pain is weakness leaving the body, I'm strong, I don't want the pain. The burning hot water drips down and hits my scrapped hands, which make them feel worse. I'm not weak. I fall down in the shower, the water is too hot. _The perfect way to hurt yourself. _I could have sworn I said that once before. I close my eyes and cry. No more. I then strip and take off my wet clothing and let the hot water hit my directly bare skin as tears pour down my face. I then lean forward and change the temperature of the water from burning hot to ice cold. The water hits my damaged skin like nails and I yelp in pain as tears continue to trickle down my face. I collapse on the ground as the water relentlessly pounds on my back. I then look up through the water and my tears and see my razor. I reach for it. No. It's stupid. Don't do it Miles. Don't do it.

I pick up the razor and look at the sharp edges. "But it doesn't hurt anymore." I barely notice the ice water anymore. "I-it feels good." I let my thumb scrape over the razor just deep enough for it to scratch me. I examine my thumb and see the blood dripping out.

I am living.

I am alive.

But do I wanna be? This pain, this pain to myself I-I can't even remember what I was mad about what made me do this? All my focus is on the pain right now, in my thumb. "And it feels good." I bite my lower lip and play with the razor in my hand.

"Miley?" Are you fucking kidding me? Oliver just has to stop. Give up. I look out past my shower curtain and to the bathroom door, knowing Oliver will pop up momentarily. I swallow hard. I do and don't want to do this. But what do I have to live for. My Dad left, the rest of my family probably don't even think about me. Oliver has tons of friends he'll be able to move on. I cry more. I shut my eyes tight and place the razor near my wrist ready to scrape it across with all my might, when the bathroom door swings open. I hear a gasp and then my name. I open my eyes and look, but surprised when I did not see Oliver but…Lilly. "Miley!" She rushes towards me and I look at myself in the position that I am in. I pull the razor away from my wrist and let it fall to the floor. Lilly turns the water off and grabs a towel to wrap around me. I don't think or do anything but lunge at Lilly and she holds me in her arms, as I cry.

I found my reason for living. It's Lilly. And I think it has always been her. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

Lilly holds on to me tight. And she is crying slightly herself. "Shhh Miles, its okay, its okay, I'm right here. Always." I pull Lilly tighter to me and let all my waves of emotion come flooding out. My sobs are so loud I'm sure my neighbors hear. But I don't care. Lilly rubs my back and tries to calm me down and before I know it, I black out.

--x--

I move slightly, when I feel something next to me. I open up my eyes and realize I'm still in my room, on my bed, with Lilly. She is holding me, well sort of. Her eyes are closed but I can see her tear stained face. I snuggle closer to her moving my head to her chest listening to her breathing and heart beat. "Lilly?" I don't think my voice has ever been softer, or hoarser. Lilly opens up her eyes and looks down at me and smiles, always smiling. "I'm sorry."

Lilly lifts her hand and strokes my hair. "Not now Miles, go back to sleep, just sleep." Lilly leans forward and places a kiss on the top of my head. She then scoots herself into a different position so my head is in the crook of her neck and I can snake my arm around her waist. And we fall back to sleep.

--x--

I feel Lilly squirm slightly underneath me and I wake up, hours must have gone by. "Sorry, did I wake you?" I shake my head no and Lilly smiles. She kisses my forehead and helps me sit up and I lean my head on her shoulder. "You feeling better?" I nod. "Good then you might wanna get changed." My eyes grow wide and I look down at myself. I'm still naked. I slept with Lilly…naked. Holy cow that would be hot if I didn't feel as embarrassed as I do right now.

"I err, umm right." I jump out of the bed and away from Lilly, I frantically look around my room and try to gather my clothes, but I steal a quick glance at Lilly who cannot not help but laugh at my embarrassment which only causes my face to grow redder than it was before. "I'll be right back." I run to my bathroom with my sweat clothes and change.

Before coming out I washed my face and combed through my hair, putting it up in a pony tail. I look in my mirror and sigh. This is going to be a very long conversation. I open the door and see Lilly still sitting on my bed, but reading a magazine. She looks up when she hears the door open and puts a smile on her face. "Now there's Miley." I stay quiet. Lilly leans back in my bed and open her arms for me. "Come here." I happily make my way over to Lilly and back into her arms. She rocks me slightly and I know that we have to talk about it but I don't want too. We stay silent for a few minutes before the big question comes. "Why?"

Hearing how hurt and worried Lilly's voice sounded I feel like I should have killed myself, but she made me live, so… "I-I don't know."

"Yes you do." I sigh. Yes I do. I move from Lilly's grasp and sit a few inches away from her. I play with my hands and look down at them. "Hey…" I feel Lilly lean forward and brush the bangs out of my and tuck the strands of hair behind my ear. I then look up at her and she is wearing her comforting smile. "It's okay Miley. I'm not going to judge you, or hurt you…I-I love you…I'll help you Miles, please let me help you."

I sigh again. I then look into Lilly's eyes, then remember the promise I made to myself and look away. "Lilly…I don't know. I-I have never told anyone, I'm okay, I just need a friend, I'm okay. I'll forget about it, I can deal with the pain."

Lilly reaches down and grabs one of my hands and holds on tight, causing me to look back at her. "I'll always be a friend Miles, best friend," I smile on the outside, but I want more on the inside. "But, this problem, your pain, it-it almost killed you Miley." Lilly's voice trials off at the end and fresh tears are starting to form in her eyes, I look away. "I don't want to lose you Miley. You're special, different," I look back up at her again and she is smiling as a few tears fall. "And I really like that." I bite on my lower lip. "Please."

I shake my head slightly. "I don't know Lilly I never told anyone, not even Oliver, and I never trusted anyone and-" I stop once she lets go of my hand and uses both of her hands to grab my face.

She forces me to look at her. "Miley," She says my name sternly so I'll pay attention. "You can trust me." Whoa. That was an intense. I guess she must trust me too.

I reach for her hands and pull them down off of my face. Quietly and weakly I reply. "Okay." She smiles, but she won't be smiling when I tell her my story. My life, everything.

--x--

I begin my story and she listens intently, I tell her everything:

"When I was little my life was great. We were a happy great family, well except for Jackson," I smile slightly and let out a laugh thinking about my older brother, he was so annoying, yet so great, my role model, although I would never tell anyone. "My Mom, she was beautiful," I leaned across Lilly in the bed and grab the picture of my Mother to show Lilly, she took it and gazed at my Mother. "We did everything together, cooked, cleaned, danced, sang, everything. She was a mother of no other. I remember everyone loving my Mom, all the other kids would say how cool she was and what great cookies she made, and I would smile with pride. And my Dad, my Dad was one of my best friends. He taught me a lot. We would play sports, ride horses, go hiking, camping, make fires in our backyard for smores, life was perfect…Then for reasons unknown to me something changed." I still don't understand why he did it. Or how could he do it, do that, to me, to Jackson, and especially my Mother.

"Daddy, he would start coming home late, go into work early, not pay so much attention to Jackson or I, and every time he tried to have a conversation with Momma it usually ended up in an argument. They would start to fight constantly until one night Daddy walked out…he was gone for three days. That's when my Mother starting packing and I remember her crying and saying that she just could not handle this anymore, I didn't understand it then, but I do now. Apparently my Momma filed for a divorce and my Father accepted but they each took one kid, Jackson to Momma, and me to Daddy." I still feel angry about that, I mean, why wouldn't a Mother want their little girl? "I don't think my Daddy was all too happy about it, but he agreed to it. He stopped seeing whoever he was seeing and said he could not stay here anymore, so we moved."

I was too little to have a say in any of this, I was just a kid. I trusted my parents, Momma and Daddy, so I went along with Daddy's plans. "We came here to California and I thought things were good. My Daddy found a job, I found a friend, things were falling into place, and again I still don't know what happened. Daddy just totally spiraled into a vortex he could not get out of. He started staying out late, not coming home, and as I got older this routine got longer, he would stay out later, there would be nights I would not eat. I guess I let my anger get the best of me. I was so mad at what my Daddy did and is still doing, and what he just did, and I was so hurt that my Momma would even consider letting me go with him, and not even trying to fight for me. And I guess I also envy Jackson quiet some, I mean he gotta stay with Momma, why couldn't I?"

By this point I can feel my throat constricting and tears welling up in my eyes, I have not looked at Lilly the whole time. I'm afraid. I just poured all my feelings on Lilly, dumped them all on top of her, and she stayed quiet through out the whole thing. I feel movement on my bed and I turn to see Lilly shift from her position to sit next to me and she rested her head on my shoulder, instinctively I rested my head onto of hers. Right now my feelings for her did not matter; right now I had a friend. "It's not your fault Miles." I'm aware, but it still hurts. "I'm sorry." I take a deep breath and let it out. "I mean I promised that I too would take all the pain away, but I don't know how. I'm very sorry Miley."

I wrap my arm around her and pull her close to me. "Lilly its okay, I know it does not seem like it, but you just being here, listening, comforting me, you are taking the pain away Lil, you are…thank you."

"You're right; I don't feel like I'm doing anything. But," Lilly lifts her head and I move mine so she could move hers. "Don't you feel better now?" I smirk, I wanna say 'no' because I have a feeling she will bask in her glory of being right. "I see that you want to smile Miles." I turn my head away from her and shake my head. "Yes you do I can see it…smile," Lilly pokes me lightly in my ribs and I jump but do my best to hold my composure. "Smile, smile, smile." Which each 'smile' she keeps poking me. "Gosh darn it smile Stewart!" Lilly then jumps on me, straddling my hips, and tackles my ribs and I let my laughter fill the room, which causes Lilly to laugh along.

I squirm underneath Lilly as she continues to tickle me and the rubbing of her body on top of mine sets me on fire. "Okay…okay….s-stop." Lilly then stops and leans forward over me, looking down at me. She smiles for about the billionth time, she is still laughing somewhat, while I'm trying to catch my breath. "What?"

"Nothing, I just," Lilly looks away from me and lets her eyes wander around the room before they land back on me. "I just really like your laugh." I blush slightly, I have a raspy voice and in return my laugh is low and rough as well. "Y'know how you were saying before about you changing into that 'bad girl' type thingy?" I nod. "Well, I like this Miley a heck of a lot better." Lilly gives me another smile before she slides off of me and even though she is right next to me, I miss our body contact, the heat and warmth. Lilly lies down right next to and stares at the ceiling. "So…what're you going to do about your Dad?"

I sigh and sit up. "I don't know. What can I do? I'll be okay."

"Miley, no." I look back at Lilly and she moves to sit up. "He abandoned you that is wrong, illegal, he can't do that." I turn my head; I don't want to talk about it. Lilly stops her ramble hate. "Sorry."

I shrug it off. "S'okay."

"Look Miles, I know I don't speak for my parents, but you can come stay with me and my family, y'know that is if you want to, but I kind of feel as if you have to."

I smile. "Thanks for the offer, but I can't do that Lilly." Lilly opens her mouth to speak but I interrupt her. "I mean, I don't want anyone else to know my situation."

"Miley that is ridiculous. Someone will find out eventually, I mean Oliver and I were suspicious how long do you think it will take for a teacher at school to find out?" I look at Lilly with desperate eyes. She looks away. "I don't want to see you like this Miles."

I do some quick thinking and make up an excuse I should have probably thought more of. "I'll stay with Oliver."

Lilly looks at me quickly and quizzically. "Oliver's? So what is the difference between Oliver's parents and mine?"

"Nothing, but-"

"So if it's nothing, then why can't you stay with me?" Lilly sounds hurt, I would stay with her, I want to stay with her, but my feelings would totally get in the way.

I need time to think, but sadly my mouth talks faster than my brain. "Cause your there." I mumble under my breath and regret it. Oh dear God please don't tell me she heard that.

"What?" I look at Lilly and see hurt in her eyes. I go to speak but this time she cuts me off. "Miley-We're friends right?"

"Yes! Yes Lilly! I did mean that, it has nothing to do about you, I-"

"Then how come you said it was about me?!" Lilly stands up and I follow her raising my hands in front of me, and she folds her over her chest.

"It's not about you it's about…" Lilly is waiting for me, her eyebrows raise and her eyes stare at me I think she wants to kill me with that look. I look away and swallow I need something to save me. Then I spot my guitar. "Lilly?" She looks at me but does not answer. "I-I umm have that song for you finished." When I mention the song Lilly's facial features soften.

"Miley…that is totally-"

"Justletmeplayitforyou." I say so fast she stops talking and gives me a defeated sigh and look. She unfolds her arms and looks at my guitar.

"Fine." She turns around and I usher her to go sit on the bed. I rush over and grab my guitar and strum the strings to make sure they are in tune enough.

"Okay Lilly," Lilly does not look at me. "Lilly look at me please?" She rolls her eyes and reluctantly looks at me. "Okay, Lilly this day," I look outside before looking back at Lilly. "And night, have been the worst roller coaster ride I have had in awhile. But-But I'm ready to get on a new one, that is if you let me. Now I just opened up to you something so deep, I cannot not believe how okay I am with it, and now," I tap on my guitar and Lilly is now fully paying attention to me, with a concern look on her face. "I'm going to do it again. So please-umm just keep in mind that we are friends…best friends." She nods and I start strumming my guitar. I close my eyes as I began to sing.

_The dawn is breaking  
A light shining through  
You're barely waking  
And I'm tangled up in you  
Yeah_

Yeah, risky, I'm pouring all my feelings out and I'm refusing to look at Lilly, but hey I figured I was on a roll why not go with it?

_You're open, I'm closed  
Where you'll go, I'll follow_

_I worry I won't see your face  
Light up again_

Until now, now I'm pouring everything out, and I never did what I intended to do. Ease her into it, try and get a clue to see if she is okay with gays, but I'm just jumping. I'm jumping into unknown waters, now is the time to decide if she will let me sink or swim.

_Even the best fall down sometimes  
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme  
Out of the doubt that fills my mind  
I somehow find  
You and I collide_

When we started to become friends we realized we were totally polar opposites of each other, but hey that's what made us 'collide' right?

_I'm quiet you know  
You make a first impression  
I've found I'm scared to know your always on my mind_

When I first saw Lilly, I fell for her, and this definitely feels like falling, and it's great, feeling, hopefully she wont let me crash land.

_Even the best fall down sometimes  
Even the stars refuse to shine  
Out of the back you fall in time  
I somehow find  
You and I collide_

_Don't stop here_

_I've lost my place_

_I'm close behind_

I've lost myself, completely, and Lilly is helping me find the missing pieces again. That I will be forever grateful.

_Even the best fall down sometimes  
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme  
Out of the doubt that fills your mind  
You finally find  
You and I collide_

_You finally find  
You and I collide  
You finally find  
You and I collide_

I finish singing and let my guitar take it home. I close my eyes tight and bite my lip before I slowly open them. I look down at my guitar. I inhale a big breath. I'm about to do something I never even have done with Oliver. My heart starts pounding in my chest, my body heat rises, I begin to sweat. So many second thoughts are running through my mind. But I cannot let my mind think for me. I just have to let my heart and actions of my heart take control. I shift my gaze and stare Lilly straight in her eyes. Her facial expression is unreadable. I stare for a few more seconds longer and she captures my eyes with hers.

Then I swallow.

And my wall falls.

**--x--**

**Okay, well that was longer, right? So what do you think? What do you think Lilly thinks? Did Miley jump too soon? Well we'll find out next chapter. Till then :). **

**Disclaimer 2: I do not own the song Collide by Howie Day, although I did switch a few words around, all credit goes to him. **


	17. Chapter 16

**Hey guys', thank you all for reading and reviewing. Lets start getting something started between these two shall we? Okay so once again thank you all so much, please enjoy. **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**--x--**

Lilly shifts her gaze from my left eye to my right eye, then back again. I grow nervous and impatient. I lick my lips as Lilly and I continue our staring contest. I clench my jaw and swallow for the thousandth time. I just gave Lilly everything, every little piece of me, and she has not spoken, or made any movement. Maybe I did it too fast. Maybe I rushed into things. Maybe I shouldn't have done it. Maybe I should say something, tell her it doesn't mean what it really means. My mouth opens then closes. Lilly shifts her eyes from my eyes to my lips and back again. Sadness. I see sadness. Sorrow. Compassion. Sympathy. Hurt. Confusion.

Regret. Not in her eyes, but probably in mine. I shouldn't have done this. I probably just ruined something amazing. I was too selfish I wanted more, I didn't care about friendship. I wanted more. I wanted her. I wanted friendship, but with something special, I wanted to feel loved. I want my love to be reciprocated from someone else. Lilly continues to look in my eyes, she then leans forward, and I can't take it anymore. "Lilly." She jumps away, her breath quickens pace, I probably scared her after all the silence then me saying her name abruptly. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to dump all of this onto you, I just needed a friend, and that's what you are…a friend. A good friend, a great friend, my best friend. You are very important to me; I would not want to risk or do anything to change that. I hope you can handle it. Lilly-"

"Miley," Lilly interrupts me and reaches over putting her hand over my mouth. "It's okay. Chill, relax, calm down, and take a breath. It's alright, I'm cool." She moves her hand away from my mouth, glides it across my cheek, and pulls some of my hair, that had fallen, out of my face. "Did you really mean it?"

Mean what? What do I mean? What does she want me to mean? I can't read her. I can't tell if she is okay with me liking her, or if she does not understand that I like her, or what. I'm not sure. What should I answer, does she want to be more than friends. "Mean wh-Yeah, I meant it." Lilly looks at me and smiles. "I mean you are my best friend and I would not want to lose you." I could not help but notice the smile leaving Lilly's eyes. "You changed me Lil, and for the better. My whole attitude changed…and I like that. I like that you could do that, I like that I'm becoming a better person. I guess I was afraid to admit it, I guess I was afraid of change, I guess I was to stuck in the past that I never thought anything could get better. But it did."

I softly smile at her and she smiles back. Nothing is said. "That was a great song Miles." I smile wider.

"It was for my friend." Her smile narrows. What did I do wrong? I was saving myself right? I was protecting her right? She doesn't feel the same way right? She did understand right?

"Yeah, best friends." Lilly speaks softly and quietly. Dear God please tell me I did not screw up.

--x--

Three days have gone bye and my living arrangements are now with Oliver. His parents do not know yet, I just told them my dad went on an unexpected business trip for a few days and he wanted me to stay with them. The Oken's don't mind, they are nice people, and they are rarely around so all in all I guess its okay. Oliver does not know either. It's the same story with his parents as it is for him. He's a great friend, but I have to open up to one person at a time.

I'm at Lilly's now. Its funny, I'm staying with Oliver, yet I have been over Lilly's house so much more. We are doing homework and it is quiet. Lilly is at her desk and I'm in my usual spot. I look up from my English paper and stare at the back of Lilly's head. I take a deep breath and let it out slowly. Lilly turns around, a concerned look on her face. "You okay?"

I give her a smile. "Yeah fine…just a lot of homework." She nods and gives me a small smile before returning to her work. In these past three days Lilly has not been herself. She is less perky and bubbly and happy. I think she is afraid to leave me alone because she checks up on me about every ten minuets. She will call me right when I get up in the morning and right before I go to bed at night. I sort of love it, but then again I don't. I want to gain her trust back. I want her to know that I'm okay. That I will never do that again. That it is a stupid selfish act, I won't do it. I could not put the people I love through that pain.

"Lilly?" Lilly finishes writing whatever she was writing and turns around to look at me. "Are you okay?"

She looks at her paper then back at me. "Yeah, why?" I roll my eyes; she knows I didn't mean it as an everyday question. "Miley I'm fine okay, just let's finish our papers, kay?" I nod, but I don't agree. We continue to work in silence. Was it something I did?

"Lilly?" Lilly grips her pen tight and sighs, she then turns around to look at me.

"What Miley?" She is annoyed. Why is she annoyed? I'm worried about her. Excuse me for asking.

I wanted to say something more but nothing happens. "Nothing." She then rolls her eyes and goes back to her work. "I know you are lying." Lilly rubs her forehead with her hand. "I know you are not okay. I know something is bothering you. Let me help you. Like you help me."

I don't know when it happened but somewhere along the way I grew caring and concerned about people just like Lilly. She helped me and now it's my turn to help her. "No Miley. I'm not lying, nothing is wrong. Everything is fine." She does not even look my way, she talks but her back is facing me.

"No, I'm right," I put my book down and stand up, Lilly sighs. "W-was it something I did?" I take a step closer and she turns around in her chair, sad and annoyed expression on her face. "I'm sorry Lilly, I didn't meant to dump all on that on you, I know it was a lot of information and if you need sometime I cou-"

"Miley. Nothing is wrong, yes it was a lot of information, but I could handle it, I'm happy to help you and I'm glad when you are glad."

"So why wont you let me help you?" I step closer and Lilly eyes me closely. She looks down away from me. "You are not happy now. Lilly if I did something tell me. Did I do something?"

"Yes…" I want to talk again but she speaks before me. "Finish you paper Miles." She demands me and then turns away in her chair to finish her paper.

Yes. She said yes and she wants me to drop it? "Yes? What do you mean yes?" She ignores me. I walk over to her desk and put my hand on top of hers, where she is writing, to prevent her from writing. "Lilly talk to me, what did I do?"

"Nothing, just drop it Miles and let go." Lilly struggles to get her hand and pen back, but I won't give up.

"Liar." I shift Lilly in her seat so she is facing me and grab her other hand. "You say yes I did something and then you say its nothing. It's obviously something Lil, tell me, I hate you like this, I want the happy Lilly back." Lilly struggles with me before she gives up. "Tell me what I did."

She sighs. "Miles, you didn't do anything, I did something, I'm angry at myself, I'm sorry I took it out on you, but it was something that you did that made me angry at myself. So yes you did do something, but no you didn't"

Is she still scared about me trying to commit suicide? "Was it-"

"No Miley it was not because of that." Lilly does not like to mention it much, especially that moment. Actually we both do not like to mention it. "I mean you scared the living daylights out of me and I'm concerned about you twenty-four seven, but it was not that." Then what was it? Without me having to ask out loud Lilly answers. "It was your song, the song you wrote for me. I guess I got something out of it differently then what you did."

I ease my grip on Lilly. "…Lilly what…"

Lilly shakes her head and escapes from me pushing herself back and stands up. "Maybe you should go Miles."

"No Lilly." Lilly walks over to my things and packs them in my bag before handing them to me and pushing me. I try to stop her but I don't want to hurt her. "Lilly stop. I'm not leaving." Lilly stops and lightly keeps her hand on my arm. "Lilly do-do you have feelings for me?" Say yes Lilly, say yes, say yes and let my heart soar, let the butterflies in my stomach dance, let me get light headed and dizzy Lil.

Lilly looks at me in shock, and then shakes her head. "No, leave Miley!" She pushes me and yells at me to leave, I won't let her.

I through my bag down and take a hold of Lilly's arm. This might be seen as abusive but I'm doing it for opposite reasons. "No Lilly, don't try to push me away…literally. I know what that is like don't do it!"

"Miley, just leave, I'm fine, I need time on my own, time to think, and I don't have feelings for you, nothing more than a friend! Now leave!" Lilly gets louder with ever word and I'm starting to get nervous, what if her parents hear. I know that I'm starting to grow on them, but I still feel as if they don't like me. I let Lilly push me, then I purposely lose my strength, causing the both of us to fall back into the closed door. My back hammers against the door and Lilly falls on top of me. If I wasn't holding her she would have fallen. "Ow, Miley what was that for?"

"I don't want to leave Lil. I don't want you pushing me away. In fact I want to be pushed closer to you Lilly." Lilly's eyebrows knit together and she adjusts herself, while standing on top of me.

"What are you talking about?" Lilly stares into my eyes and I look from her eyes to her lips, dieing to kiss them.

"You were right Lil, that song meant more than just friends. I want to be more than just friends." I gave Lilly no time to answer because I bent down and leaned forward capturing my lips with hers. My eyes fluttered closed and my hands moved to her waist. Now I can't see Lilly, but I can imagine her eyes closing. Why? Her arms wrap around my neck and she deepens the kiss. One of her hands travel to my cheek but I need to pull away. I slowly let my lips leave hers, but keep our faces centimeters apart. Our noses are barely touching and we are both breathing heavily. I feel her hot breath on my lips and I desperately want to kiss her again. Lilly opens her eyes and we stare at each other. I then get a smirk on my face, she likes me, more then a friend, the kiss said so and kisses don't lie. "Liar." I spoke softly as the word came out in one breath.

Lilly smiles wide and the smile reaches her eyes. "Guilty." I smile as well, but it does not last long. Her hand that was on my cheek travels to the back of my head and she pulls me in for another kiss. I pull her body closer to me and she leans into me, causing my whole body to collide with the door. Lilly's hand goes back to cupping my cheek as the kiss deepens. I can't believe it, finally, I got Lilly. I smile big, making the kiss sloppy, and not as perfect as it was before. Lilly feels my smile and pulls away. "What?"

She lowers her hand from my cheek and I raise mine from her waist to place on her cheek. "Nothing I'm just happy. I've waited so long, since the moment I saw you, and now it's real." I let my thumb move side to side on Lilly's cheek, I then feel it get very warm as she blushes and looks down, before looking up back at me.

"I know what you mean." I laugh slightly, its not loud just enough for only Lilly to hear. I lean forward and peck Lilly's lips. I pull away, she has a small pout on her lips and I lean in once more, causing her to smile. I never want to see her sad again.

I kiss Lilly for the third time and all my troubles are gone. I don't care that my Father abandoned me, I don't care that the rest of my family forgot about me, I don't care about anything else but Lilly. I then hear a knock on the door that is on my back and Mrs. Truscott's voice sounds through the wood. "Lilly, Miley, is everything alright in there?"

I feel Lilly's lips leave mine and I look at her with a pout. Lilly raises one finger and places it on my lips mouthing 'one second'. "Everything is perfect Mom…way past perfect." Lilly says the last part to herself and me, so her mother cannot her, and stares into my eyes and smiles. I smile in return. She removes her finger away from my mouth and it is replaced with her lips.

I kiss her back happily and Mrs. Truscott's voice carries past the door again. "Okay, dinner is going to be ready soon, is Miley staying?" Our lips separate again making a small smacking sound.

Lilly licks her lips and rolls her eyes. "Yes Mom, she's staying." I laugh at Lilly and Mrs. Truscott; she is totally unaware what is happening behind this door and I find that funny. Lilly lightly smacks my shoulder and I pretend to be hurt. "We'll be down soon Mom."

"Okay, you have about ten minuets." Lilly and I stay still as we hear her Mom's footprints fade away. I look at Lilly with a big smile on my face before it transforms with laughter. I laugh, I don't really know why but I laugh. Lilly's smile on her lips soon forms into a laugh too and she leans forward into me. Our bodies our touching and Lilly rests her head on my shoulder. I guess I'm just happy. More than happy. I'm no longer falling, because Lilly is teaching me to fly. One thing that makes me even happier is that Lilly didn't jump or pull away from me when her Mother knocked on the door. She continued to kiss me that should be something. Lilly and I stop our laughing fit and she lifts her head from my shoulder. I look down at her and lean in to kiss her again, but she pulls away.

"Whoa not so fast tiger, I think we need to talk." Dang it she's right. "Come here." Lilly pulls away from me and takes my arm, she then drags me to her bed and we both sit. I sit patiently for Lilly to do say something, but nothing happens. She then does something. She leans forward and kisses me. Man this will never get old.

I reluctantly pull away. "Sorry Lils, but the last time I checked talking did not involve peoples lips pressed up against each other."

Lilly giggles and takes my hand, I allow her to play with it. "I know I just…you're a good kisser."

"Back at ya." Lilly looks at me and laughs some more as my accent got thicker. I blush and turn away. Waiting for my blush to go away. As much as I do want to continue to kiss Lilly and do it forever we do have to talk. I clear my throat and look back at Lilly. "So about that talk."

"Yeah…" Neither of us says anything, what is there to say really. "How long?"

No more needs to be said I know what she is asking. "Since the first time I saw you. Since the first time I saw you I was interested in you. I knew somehow someway I wanted to meet you, talk to you, become friends with you, but most importantly love you."

Lilly looks deep into my eyes before leaning in and pecking me on my lips. I'll say more things like that if that is how I get rewarded. "Y'know the first time I saw you, you were getting lectured by that teacher. I don't know what for but he was scolding you and you did not care. I liked your independent, not caring attitude, I don't know kind of like a bad boy, or girl, and I liked it, I guess I was attracted to you, interested. I wanted to know you more. But then Amber and Ashley got in my way. But I'm glad I found my way back to you. I'm glad that we are friends and now hopefully more than that."

She left my hand idle for awhile and so I began to play with it. "Lilly I would be more than happy to be more than friends with you; I would be honored to be your girlfriend and even more pleased if you were mine."

"So you are okay with this, us, being together, girlfriend and girlfriend, partners." I nodded. Lilly then lets out a sigh. "This is relief."

"You're telling me." Lilly looks at me and smiles. "I mean like, I never knew that you were interested in me, you never showed any signs, you never should any signs that you were even okay with homosexuality. I guess I had doubts and fears, but I'm glad they are gone now."

"I know and I'm sorry I put you through so much. But hey I went through some stuff to y'know." I rose and eyebrow at her and give her a questioning look. "Okay, okay, I know that they were not as bad as yours but hey it was still torture. Liking someone from afar not sure if they like you the same way or not. I guess what really hit for me was when you tried…well y'know. I was so scared; I did not want to lose you. I didn't not want to lose you without getting a chance with you."

"I'm sorry Lilly. When I was in the shower and I saw you I realized that I did not want to do that, that I wanted to live, the reason is you." I don't know why but like before when I started laughing, I started to cry. "I would never want to leave you Lil, and I don't want you to leave me…you're changing my life, and that is something big. Thank you Lilly. I want to say more, but I just can't get the words right now."

"Miley," Lilly then moved forward and leaned me down, so my head would rest on her shoulder, she then stroked my hair and talked softly in my ear. "Its okay, sometimes words cannot express everything you need to say. But you did fine. The other day when you played that song for me and looked into my eyes, I saw your story, more then when you told it. I didn't know what to think at first I wanted to do everything, hug you, comfort you, and kiss you. I wanted to take everything away, make it better. I'll always be there for Miles." Lilly then placed a kiss on my head before resting her own on mine. "No matter what I'll support you, unless it's something really stupid then I'll have to disagree." I laughed at that and I felt Lilly smile. I then moved causing Lilly to lift her head off of mine and I raised my head to look at Lilly. She then reached forward and wiped some of my stray tears away, before placing a kiss on my lips.

"Thank you Lilly. I want nothing to come between us." Remember when I was talking about a candle and how mine went out. Well it was reignited, it's burning and the burning will continue to grow, as long as I have Lilly.

"Nothing ever will Miley."

**--x--**

**Well there you have it folks, Miley and Lilly finally together. But that this is not the end. These two are going to have a journey. Will they tell Lilly's parents, what about Oliver? Find out next chapter. Till then :). **


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